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When the time comes that a man has had his dinner, then the true man comes to the surface

Mark Twain

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Mark Twain
Age: 74 †
Born: 1835
Born: November 30
Died: 1910
Died: April 21
Aphorist
Author
Autobiographer
Humorist
Journalist
Novelist
Opinion Journalist
Prosaist
Science Fiction Writer
Teacher
Florida
Missouri
Samuel Langhorne Clemens
Samuel L. Clemens
Samuel Clemens
Dinner
Surface
Food
Comes
True
Men
Time

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The unexamined life may not be worth living, but the life too closely examined may not be lived at all.
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It is your human environment that makes climate
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I was born with Halley's Comet and I expect to die upon its return
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What would men be without women? Scarce, sir...mighty scarce.
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I am always on the side of the revolutionists, because there never was a revolution unless there were some oppressive and intolerable conditions against which to revolute.
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Anyone who can only think of one way to spell a word obviously lacks imagination.
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Dying man couldn't make up his mind which place to go to-both have their advantages, heaven for the climate, hell for the company!
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A half-truth is the most cowardly of lies.
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I pledged myself to smoke but one cigar a day. I kept the cigar waiting until bedtime, then I had a luxurious time with it. But desire persecuted me every day and all day long. I found myself hunting for larger cigars...within the month my cigar had grown to such proportions I could have used it as a crutch.
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One is apt to overestimate beauty when it is rare
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My father was a Saint Bernard, my mother was a Collie, but I am a Presbyterian.
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When whole races and peoples conspire to propagate gigantic mute lies in the interest of tyrannies and shams, why should we care anything about the trifling lies told by individuals?
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I have been studying the traits and dispositions of the lower animals (so called) and contrasting them with the traits and dispositions of man. I find the result humiliating to me.
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Name the greatest of all inventors. Accident.
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Stars and shadows ain't good to see by.
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A wise man does not waste so good a commodity as lying for naught.
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Ethical man: A Christian holding four aces.
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The rain ...falls upon the just and the unjust alike a thing which would not happen if I were superintending the rain's affairs. No, I would rain softly and sweetly on the just, but if I caught a sample of the unjust outdoors, I would drown him.
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If you do read the newspaper you are misinformed.
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