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I will remark in the way of general information, that in California, that land of felicitous nomenclature, the literary name of this sort of stuff is hogwash
Mark Twain
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Mark Twain
Age: 74 †
Born: 1835
Born: November 30
Died: 1910
Died: April 21
Aphorist
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Autobiographer
Humorist
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Florida
Missouri
Samuel Langhorne Clemens
Samuel L. Clemens
Samuel Clemens
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Hogwash
More quotes by Mark Twain
This autobiography of mine is a mirror, and I am looking at myself in it all the time. Incidentally I notice the people that pass along at my back - I get glimpses of them in the mirror - and whenever they say or do anything that can help advertise me and flatter me and raise me in my own estimation, I set these things down in my autobiography.
Mark Twain
In other localities certain places in the streams are much better than others, but at Niagara one place is just as good as another, for the reason that the fish do not bite anywhere.
Mark Twain
There are two types of speakers: those that are nervous and those that are liars.
Mark Twain
Is a person's public and private opinion the same? It is thought there have been instances.
Mark Twain
Knowledge becomes wisdom only after it has been put to good use.
Mark Twain
Methuselah lived to be 969 years old . You boys and girls will see more in the next fifty years than Methuselah saw in his whole lifetime.
Mark Twain
He who asks is a fool for five minutes, but he who does not ask remains a fool forever.
Mark Twain
You try to tell me anything about the newspaper business! Sir, I have been through it from Alpha to Omaha, and I tell you that the less a man knows the bigger the noise he makes and the higher the salary he commands.
Mark Twain
Religion consists in a set of things which the average man thinks he believes and wishes he was certain of.
Mark Twain
The secret of getting ahead is getting started. The secret of getting started is breaking your complex overwhelming tasks into small manageable tasks, and starting on the first one.
Mark Twain
Man proposes, but God blocks the game.
Mark Twain
A banquet is probably the most fatiguing thing in the world except ditch digging.
Mark Twain
To be a patriot, one had to say, and keep on saying, Our Country, right or wrong, and urge on the little war. Have you not perceived that that phrase is an insult to the nation?
Mark Twain
The dreamer's valuation of a thing lost - not another man's - is the only standard to measure it by, and his grief for it makes it large and great and fine, and is worthy of our reverence in all cases.
Mark Twain
Human Beings are the only animals that blush, or need to.
Mark Twain
If horses knew their strength we should not ride anymore.
Mark Twain
Courage is not the lack of fear. It is acting in spite of it.
Mark Twain
The human being places sexual intercourse above all other joys, but leaves it out of his heaven.
Mark Twain
You can't no more teach what you ain't learned than you can come from where you ain't been.
Mark Twain
We must put up with clothes as they are they have their reason for existing. They are on us to expose us to advertise what we wear them to conceal.
Mark Twain