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I never can think of Judas Iscariot without losing my temper. To my mind Judas Iscariot was nothing but a low, mean, premature, Congressman.

Mark Twain

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Mark Twain
Age: 74 †
Born: 1835
Born: November 30
Died: 1910
Died: April 21
Aphorist
Author
Autobiographer
Humorist
Journalist
Novelist
Opinion Journalist
Prosaist
Science Fiction Writer
Teacher
Florida
Missouri
Samuel Langhorne Clemens
Samuel L. Clemens
Samuel Clemens
Thinking
Politics
Political
Judas
Without
Premature
Nothing
Congressman
Mean
Temper
Mind
Lows
Never
Congress
Think
Losing

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There is no family in America without a clock, and consequently there is no fair pretext for the usual Sunday medley of dreadful sounds that issues from our steeples.
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The dog is a gentleman I hope to go to his heaven not man's.
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The new political gospel: public office is private graft.
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The way it is now, the asylums can hold the sane people, but if we tried to shut up the insane we should run out of building materials.
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It has taken a weary long time to persuade American Presbyterians to give up infant damnation and try to bear it the best they can.
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A crime persevered in a thousand centuries ceases to be a crime, and becomes a virtue. This is the law of custom, and custom supersedes all other forms of law.
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There will never be a perfect time to quit smoking. A time when you don't have any distractions or stress... If you had started today one year ago, this would not even be an issue for you today! Don't waste another year!
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I was born with Halley's Comet and I expect to die upon its return
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My father was an amazing man. The older I got, the smarter he got.
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Only a government that is rich and safe can afford to be a democracy, for democracy is the most expensive and nefarious kind of government ever heard of on earth
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Only kings, presidents, editors, and people with tapeworms have the right to use the editorial 'we.'
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Everyone is a moon, and has a dark side which he never shows to anybody.
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