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Tea is an affront to lunch and an insult to dinner.
Mark Twain
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Mark Twain
Age: 74 †
Born: 1835
Born: November 30
Died: 1910
Died: April 21
Aphorist
Author
Autobiographer
Humorist
Journalist
Novelist
Opinion Journalist
Prosaist
Science Fiction Writer
Teacher
Florida
Missouri
Samuel Langhorne Clemens
Samuel L. Clemens
Samuel Clemens
Tea
Insult
Lunch
Dinner
Affront
More quotes by Mark Twain
The only very marked difference between the average civilized man and the average savage is that the one is gilded and the other is painted.
Mark Twain
Don't look at the world with your hands in your pockets. To write about it you have to reach out and touch it.
Mark Twain
We adore titles and heredities in our hearts and ridicule them with our mouths. This is our democratic privilege.
Mark Twain
Whiskey is carried into committee rooms in demijohns and carried out in demagogues.
Mark Twain
The average American's simplest and commonest form of breakfast consists of coffee and beefsteak.
Mark Twain
Only a government that is rich and safe can afford to be a democracy, for democracy is the most expensive and nefarious kind of government ever heard of on earth
Mark Twain
We must put up with clothes as they are they have their reason for existing. They are on us to expose us to advertise what we wear them to conceal.
Mark Twain
One must travel, to learn.
Mark Twain
Customs do not concern themselves with right or wrong or reason. But they have to be obeyed one reasons all around them until he is tired, but he must not transgress them, it is sternly forbidden.
Mark Twain
Leaving out the gamblers, the burglars, and the plumbers, perhaps we do put our trust in God after a fashion. But, after all, it is an overstatement. If the cholera or black plague should come to these shores, perhaps the bulk of the nation would pray to be delivered from it, but the rest would put their trust in The Health Board.
Mark Twain
Foreigners cannot enjoy our food, I suppose, any more than we can enjoy theirs. It is not strange for tastes are made, not born. I might glorify my bill of fare until I was tired but after all, the Scotchman would shake his head and say, 'Where's your haggis?' and the Fijan would sigh and say, 'Where's your missionary?'
Mark Twain
Go and surprise the whole country by doing something right.
Mark Twain
What do you think of the human mind? I mean, in case you think there is a human mind.
Mark Twain
Those people.... early stricken of God, intellectually - the departmental interpreters of the laws in Washington... can always be depended on to take any reasonably good law and interpret the common sense all out of it.
Mark Twain
To believe yourself brave is to be brave it is the one only essential thing.
Mark Twain
Canadian girls are so pretty it's a relief now and then to see a plain one.
Mark Twain
The only certainties in life are death and taxes.
Mark Twain
There is no salvation for us but to adopt Civilization and lift ourselves down to its level.
Mark Twain
First catch your Boer, then kick him.
Mark Twain
I never write Metropolis for seven cents because I can get the same price for city. I never write policeman because I can get the same money for cop.
Mark Twain
