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There is nothing more awe-inspiring than a miracle except the credulity that can take it at par.

Mark Twain

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Mark Twain
Age: 74 †
Born: 1835
Born: November 30
Died: 1910
Died: April 21
Aphorist
Author
Autobiographer
Humorist
Journalist
Novelist
Opinion Journalist
Prosaist
Science Fiction Writer
Teacher
Florida
Missouri
Samuel Langhorne Clemens
Samuel L. Clemens
Samuel Clemens
Nothing
Take
Credulity
Awe
Inspiring
Miracle
Except

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This is the year 1492. I am eighty-two years of age. The things I am going to tell you are things which I saw myself as a child and as a youth.
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Be good and you will be lonely.
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The proverb says that Providence protects children and idiots. This is really true. I know because I have tested it.
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What is Man? Man is a noisome bacillus whom Our Heavenly Father created because he was disappointed in the monkey.
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Next you'd see a raft sliding by, away off yonder, and maybe a galoot on it chopping. . . you'd see the ax flash and come down-you don't hear nothing you see the ax go up again, and by the time it's above the man's head then you hear the k'chunk!-it had took all that time to come over the water.
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I always take Scotch whiskey at night as a preventive of toothache. I have never had the toothache and what is more, I never intend to have it.
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There's some human instinct which makes a man treasure what he is not to make any use of, because everybody does not possess it.
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There is no sadder sight than a young pessimist.
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You can tell German wine from vinegar by the label.
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...heaven for climate, and hell for society.
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Hardly a man in the world has an opinion upon morals, political, or religion which he got otherwise than through his associations and sympathies.
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Never argue with stupid people, they will drag you down to their level and then beat you with experience.
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If there is one thing that is really cheerful in the world, it is cheerfulness. I have noticed it often. And I have noticed that when a man is right down cheerful, he is seldom unhappy for the time being. Such is the nature of man.
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I wasn't worth a cent two years ago, and now I owe two million dollars.
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If you pick up a starving dog and make him prosperous he will not bite you. This is the principal difference between a dog and man.
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Teaching is like trying to hold 35 corks underwater at once.
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High and fine literature is wine, and mine is only water but everybody likes water.
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You ought never to sass old people- unless they sass you first.
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You are a coward when you even seem to have backed down from a thing you openly set out to do
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There are some natures which never grow large enough to speak out and say a bad act is a bad act, until they have inquired into the politics or the nationality of the man who did it.
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