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You can't break a bad habit by throwing it out the window. You've got to walk it slowly down the stairs.

Mark Twain

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Mark Twain
Age: 74 †
Born: 1835
Born: November 30
Died: 1910
Died: April 21
Aphorist
Author
Autobiographer
Humorist
Journalist
Novelist
Opinion Journalist
Prosaist
Science Fiction Writer
Teacher
Florida
Missouri
Samuel Langhorne Clemens
Samuel L. Clemens
Samuel Clemens
Stairs
Throwing
Slowly
Window
Habit
Walk
Walks
Break

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A man cannot be comfortable without his own approval.
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There is no such thing as the Queen's English. The property has gone into the hands of a joint stock company and we own the bulk of the shares!
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That is a society editor, sitting there elegantly dressed, with his legs crossed in that indolent way, observing the clothes the ladies wear, so that he can describe them for his paper and make them out finer than they are and get bribes for it and become wealthy.
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Honor is a harder master than the law.
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There are things which some people never attempt during their whole lives, but one of these is not poetry. Poetry attacks all human beings sooner or later, and, like the measles, is mild or violent according to the age of the sufferer.
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When someone dies, it is like when your house burns down it isn't for years that you realize the full extent of your loss.
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Many people have the reasoning facility, but no one uses it in religious matters.
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Education is what you must acquire without any interference from your schooling.
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If to be interesting is to be uncommonplace, it is becoming a question, with me, if there are any commonplace people
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when we badly want a thing, we go to hunting for good and righteous reasons for it we give it that fine name to comfort our consciences, whereas we privately know we are only hunting for plausible ones.
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A sense of humor is the one thing no one will admit to not having.
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When majority is insane, sane must go to asylum.
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To refuse awards is another way of accepting them with more noise than is normal.
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What work I have done I have done because it has been play. If it had been work I shouldn't have done it. . . . The work that is really a man's own work is play and not work at all. . . . When we talk about the great workers of the world we really mean the great players of the world.
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It's spring fever. That is what the name of it is. And when you've got it, you want—oh, you don't quite know what it is you do want, but it just fairly makes your heart ache, you want it so!
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Our best built certainties are but sand-houses and subject to damage from any wind of doubt that blows
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He was a solemn, unsmiling, sanctimonious old iceberg who looked like he was waiting for a vacancy in the Trinity.
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To do something, say something, see something, before anybody else -- these are things that confer a pleasure compared with which other pleasures are tame and commonplace, other ecstasies cheap and trivial.
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More than once I have been humiliated by my resemblance to God the father He is always longing for the love of His children and trying to get it on the cheapest and laziest terms He can invent.
Mark Twain
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While the rest of the species is descended from apes, redheads are descended from cats.
Mark Twain