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Comedy keeps the heart sweet but we all know that there is wholesome refreshment for both mind and heart in an occasional climb among the pomps of the intellectual snow-summits built by Shakespeare and those others.
Mark Twain
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Mark Twain
Age: 74 †
Born: 1835
Born: November 30
Died: 1910
Died: April 21
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Samuel Langhorne Clemens
Samuel L. Clemens
Samuel Clemens
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More quotes by Mark Twain
I would not read the proof of one of my books for any fair & reasonable sum whatever, if I could get out of it. The proof-reading on the P & Pauper cost me the last rags of my religion.
Mark Twain
Leaving out the gamblers, the burglars, and the plumbers, perhaps we do put our trust in God after a fashion. But, after all, it is an overstatement. If the cholera or black plague should come to these shores, perhaps the bulk of the nation would pray to be delivered from it, but the rest would put their trust in The Health Board.
Mark Twain
The Christian's Bible is a drug store. Its contents remain the same, but the medical practice changes.
Mark Twain
If Christ were here now there is one thing he would not be — a Christian.
Mark Twain
Two days overdue, THE WORLD'S WORK has not reached me. Pray make a note of this. I would rather not have to resort to violence.
Mark Twain
All war must be just the killing of strangers against whom you feel no personal animosity strangers whom, in other circumstances, you would help if you found them in trouble, and who would help you if you needed it.
Mark Twain
...nothing so liberalizes a man and expands the kindly instincts that nature put in him as travel and contact with many kinds of people.
Mark Twain
There will never be a perfect time to quit smoking. A time when you don't have any distractions or stress... If you had started today one year ago, this would not even be an issue for you today! Don't waste another year!
Mark Twain
A round man cannot be expected to fit in a square hole right away. He must have time to modify his shape.
Mark Twain
I knew a man who grabbed a cat by the tail and learned forty percent more about cats than the man who didn't.
Mark Twain
My father was an amazing man. The older I got, the smarter he got.
Mark Twain
India has two million gods, and worships them all. In religion all other countries are paupers India is the only millionaire.
Mark Twain
The frankest and freest and privatest product of the human mind and heart is a love letter.
Mark Twain
Let your secret sympathies and your compassion be always with the under dog in the fight -- this is magnanimity but bet on the other one -- this is business.
Mark Twain
There are times when one would like to hang the whole human race, and finish the farce.
Mark Twain
The sole impulse which dictates and compels a man's every act: the imperious necessity of securing his own approval, in every emergency and at all costs.... It is our only spur, our whip, our goad, our impelling power we have no other.
Mark Twain
Be good and you will be lonely.
Mark Twain
Pity is for the living, envy is for the dead. Death, the refuge, the solace, the best and kindliest and most prized friend and benefactor of the erring, the forsaken, the old and weary and broken of heart.
Mark Twain
I cannot see how a man of any large degree of humorous perception can ever be religious -- unless he purposely shut the eyes of his mind & keep them shut by force.
Mark Twain
The work that is really a man's own work is play and not work at all.
Mark Twain