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A railroad is like a lie you have to keep building it to make it stand.

Mark Twain

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Mark Twain
Age: 74 †
Born: 1835
Born: November 30
Died: 1910
Died: April 21
Aphorist
Author
Autobiographer
Humorist
Journalist
Novelist
Opinion Journalist
Prosaist
Science Fiction Writer
Teacher
Florida
Missouri
Samuel Langhorne Clemens
Samuel L. Clemens
Samuel Clemens
Building
Stand
Lying
Keep
Make
Like
Railroad
Railroads
Cowboy

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I think I can say, and say with pride, that we have some legislatures that bring higher prices than any in the world.
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A banquet is probably the most fatiguing thing in the world except ditchdigging. It is the insanest of all recreations. The inventor of it overlooked no detail that could furnish weariness, distress, harassment, and acute and long-sustained misery of mind and body.
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A wise man does not waste so good a commodity as lying for naught.
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When we remember we are all mad, the mysteries disappear and life stands explained.
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Travel has no longer any charm for me. I have seen all the foreign countries I want to except heaven & hell & I have only a vague curiosity about one of those.
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I find that the further I go back, the better things were, whether they happened or not.
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Whenever the human race assembles to a number exceeding four, it cannot stand free speech.
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There are basically two types of people. People who accomplish things, and people who claim to have accomplished things. The first group is less crowded.
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There are many humorous things in the world among them, the white man's notion that he is less savage than the other savages.
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A gentleman is someone who knows how to play the banjo and doesn't.
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Our best built certainties are but sand-houses and subject to damage from any wind of doubt that blows
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I simply can't resist a cat, particularly a purring one.
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This autobiography of mine is a mirror, and I am looking at myself in it all the time. Incidentally I notice the people that pass along at my back - I get glimpses of them in the mirror - and whenever they say or do anything that can help advertise me and flatter me and raise me in my own estimation, I set these things down in my autobiography.
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I am not the editor of a newspaper and shall always try to do right and be good so that God will not make me one.
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Every year you wait, long ago gets farther away.
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