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One mustn't criticize other people on grounds where he can't stand perpendicular himself

Mark Twain

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Mark Twain
Age: 74 †
Born: 1835
Born: November 30
Died: 1910
Died: April 21
Aphorist
Author
Autobiographer
Humorist
Journalist
Novelist
Opinion Journalist
Prosaist
Science Fiction Writer
Teacher
Florida
Missouri
Samuel Langhorne Clemens
Samuel L. Clemens
Samuel Clemens
Critics
Criticism
Stand
People
Perpendicular
Mustn
Grounds
Criticize

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The human race has one really effective weapon, and that is laughter.
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Sometimes you gwyne to git hurt, en sometimes you gwyne to git sick but every time you's gwyne to git well agin.
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The work that is really a man's own work is play and not work at all.
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The more you explain it, the more I don't understand it.
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There warn't anybody at the church, except maybe a hog or two, for there warn't any lock on the door, and hogs likes a puncheon floor in summer-time because it's cool. If you notice, most folks don't go to church only when they've got to but a hog is different.
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Ignorance, intolerance, egotism, self-assertion, opaque perception, dense and pitiful chuckle headedness - and an almost pathetic unconsciousness of it all, that is what I was at nineteen and twenty.
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I do not wish any reward but to know I have done the right thing.
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The miracle or the power that elevates the few is to be found in their industry, application and perseverance under the promptings of a brave, determined spirit.
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America cannot have an empire abroad and a Republic at home.
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Do something everyday that you don't want to do this is the golden rule for acquiring the habit of doing your duty without pain.
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An uneasy conscience is a hair in the mouth.
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Let us consider that we are all insane. It will explain us to each other. It will unriddle many riddles
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Always obey your parents - when they are present.
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I like a good story well told. That is the reason I am sometimes forced to tell them myself.
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The human race is a race of cowards and I am not only marching in that procession but carrying a banner.
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We have a criminal jury system which is superior to any in the world and it's efficiency is only marred by the difficulty of finding twelve men every day who don't know anything and can't read-
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Nothing spoils a good story like the arrival of an eyewitness.
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We all belong to the nasty stinking little human race, & of course it is not nice for God's beloved vermin to scoff at each other... Oh, we are a nasty little lot-& to think there are people who would like to save us & continue us. It won't happen if I have any influence.
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The Mississippi River will always have its own way no engineering skill can persuade it to do otherwise.
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