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The ignorant are afraid to betray surprise or admiration...they think it ill manners.

Mark Twain

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Mark Twain
Age: 74 †
Born: 1835
Born: November 30
Died: 1910
Died: April 21
Aphorist
Author
Autobiographer
Humorist
Journalist
Novelist
Opinion Journalist
Prosaist
Science Fiction Writer
Teacher
Florida
Missouri
Samuel Langhorne Clemens
Samuel L. Clemens
Samuel Clemens
Thinking
Admiration
Ill
Manners
Ignorant
Surprise
Ignorance
Afraid
Think
Betray

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None but an ass pays a compliment and asks a favour at the same time. There are many asses.
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You need not expect to get your book right the first time. Go to work and revamp or rewrite it. God only exhibits his thunder and lightning at intervals, and so they always command attention. These are God's adjectives. You thunder and lightning too much the reader ceases to get under the bed, by and by.
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You can't depend on your eyes when your imagination is out of focus.
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It's not the size of the dog in the fight, it's the size of the fight in the dog.
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He was a solemn, unsmiling, sanctimonious old iceberg who looked like he was waiting for a vacancy in the Trinity.
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All say, ‘how hard it is that we have to die’ -- a strange complaint to come from the mouths of those who have had to live.
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To do something, say something, see something, before anybody else -- these are things that confer a pleasure compared with which other pleasures are tame and commonplace, other ecstasies cheap and trivial.
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I was a-trembling, because I'd got to decide, forever, betwixt two things, and I knowed it.
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Low comedies are written for the drawing-room, the kitchen and the stable, and if you cut out the kitchen and the stable the drawing-room can't support the play by itself.
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When I was fourteen years old, I was amazed at how unintelligent my father was. By the time I turned twenty-one, I was astounded how much he had learned in the last seven years.
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Dying man couldn't make up his mind which place to go to-both have their advantages, heaven for the climate, hell for the company!
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... an experienced, industrious, ambitious, and often quite often picturesque liar.
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The more you explain it, the more I don't understand it.
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I have been on the verge of being an angel all my life, but it's never happened yet.
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For all the talk you hear about knowledge being such a wonderful thing, instinct is worth forty of it for real unerringness.
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Man seems to be a rickety poor sort of thing, any way you take him a kind of British Museum of infirmities and inferiorities. He is always undergoing repairs. A machine that was as unreliable as he is would have no market.
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The community is eminently Portuguese - that is to say, it is slow, poor, shiftless, sleepy, and lazy.
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Distance lends enchantment to the view.
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Conductor, when you receive a fare, Punch in the presence of the passenjare. A blue trip slip for an eight-cent fare, A buff trip slip for a six-cent fare, A pink trip slip for a three-cent fare, Punch in the presence of the passenjare! Punch, brothers! punch with care! Punch in the presence of the passenjare!
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Great enterprises usually promise vastly more than they perform.
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