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Nothing is so ignorant as a man's left hand, except a lady's watch.
Mark Twain
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Mark Twain
Age: 74 †
Born: 1835
Born: November 30
Died: 1910
Died: April 21
Aphorist
Author
Autobiographer
Humorist
Journalist
Novelist
Opinion Journalist
Prosaist
Science Fiction Writer
Teacher
Florida
Missouri
Samuel Langhorne Clemens
Samuel L. Clemens
Samuel Clemens
Watch
Hand
Left
Hands
Lady
Nothing
Ignorant
Men
Except
Ignorance
Watches
More quotes by Mark Twain
Truth is more of a stranger than fiction.
Mark Twain
I have never taken any exercise except sleeping and resting.
Mark Twain
I don't believe any of you have ever read Paradise Lost, and you don't want to. That's something that you just want to take on trust. It's a classic ... something that everybody wants to have read and nobody wants to read.
Mark Twain
Behold, the fool saith, Put not all thine eggs in the one basket - which is but a matter of saying, Scatter your money and your attention but the wise man saith, Pull all your eggs in the one basket and - WATCH THAT BASKET. - Pudd'nhead Wilson's Calendar
Mark Twain
Man will do many things to get himself loved, he will do all things to get himself envied.
Mark Twain
He was endowed with a stupidity which by the least little stretch would go around the globe four times and tie.
Mark Twain
A powerful agent is the right word: it lights the reader's way and makes it plain.
Mark Twain
I have at last, after several months' experience, made up my mind that [New York] is a splendid desert--a domed and steepled solitude, where the stranger is lonely in the midst of a million of his race.
Mark Twain
When I was 17, my father was so stupid, I didn't want to be seen with him in public. When I was 24, I was amazed at how much the old man had learned in just 7 years.
Mark Twain
I don't see any use in having a uniform and arbitrary way of spelling words. We might as well make all clothes alike and cook all dishes alike. Sameness is tiresome variety is pleasing.
Mark Twain
I have seen slower people than I am and more deliberate... and even quieter, and more listless, and lazier people than I am. But they were dead.
Mark Twain
We all live in the protection of certain cowardices which we call our principles.
Mark Twain
The heart is the real fountain of youth.
Mark Twain
Being rich ain't what it's cracked up to be. It's just worry and worry, and sweat and sweat, and a-wishing you was dead all the time.
Mark Twain
Except a person be part coward, it is not a compliment to say he is brave.
Mark Twain
The radical of one century is the conservative of the next. The radical invents the views. When he has worn them out, the conservative adopt.
Mark Twain
But the elastic heart of youth cannot be compressed into one constrained shape long at a time.
Mark Twain
You ought never to sass old people- unless they sass you first.
Mark Twain
We all belong to the nasty stinking little human race, & of course it is not nice for God's beloved vermin to scoff at each other... Oh, we are a nasty little lot-& to think there are people who would like to save us & continue us. It won't happen if I have any influence.
Mark Twain
You want to be very careful about lying otherwise you are nearly sure to get caught.
Mark Twain
