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Nothing spoils a good story like the arrival of an eyewitness.

Mark Twain

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Mark Twain
Age: 74 †
Born: 1835
Born: November 30
Died: 1910
Died: April 21
Aphorist
Author
Autobiographer
Humorist
Journalist
Novelist
Opinion Journalist
Prosaist
Science Fiction Writer
Teacher
Florida
Missouri
Samuel Langhorne Clemens
Samuel L. Clemens
Samuel Clemens
Good
Arrivals
Like
Hilarious
Spoil
Witty
Story
Eyewitness
Funny
Eyewitnesses
Stories
Spoils
Nothing
Arrival

More quotes by Mark Twain

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We are all alike, on the inside.
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Frankness is a jewel only the young can afford it.
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Anyone who can only think of one way to spell a word obviously lacks imagination.
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Two days overdue, THE WORLD'S WORK has not reached me. Pray make a note of this. I would rather not have to resort to violence.
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Only kings, presidents, editors, and people with tapeworms have the right to use the editorial 'we.'
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Blasphemy? No, it is not blashphemy. If God is as vast as that, he is above blasphemy if he is as little as that, He is beneath it.
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The holy passion of Friendship is of so sweet and steady and loyal and enduring a nature that it will last through a whole lifetime, if not asked to lend money.
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The critic's symbol should be the tumble-bug: he deposits his egg in somebody else's dung, otherwise he could not hatch it.
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Be respectful to your superiors, if you have any.
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Never let the truth get in the way of a good story.
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In my experience, previously counted chickens never do hatch.
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I couldn't bear to think about it and yet, somehow, I couldn't think about nothing else.
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Often a quite assified remark becomes sanctified by use and petrified by custom it is then a permanency, its term of activity a geologic period.
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I could never learn to like her, except on a raft at sea with no other provisions in sight.
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Always obey your parents - when they are present.
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Yes, even I am dishonest. Not in many ways, but in some. Forty-one, I think it is.
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Not a single right is indestructible: a new might can at any time abolish it, hence, man possesses not a single permanent right. God is Might (and He is shifty, malicious, and uncertain).
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If we learned to walk and talk the way we learn to read and write, everyone would limp and stutter.
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...nothing so liberalizes a man and expands the kindly instincts that nature put in him as travel and contact with many kinds of people.
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A classic is something that everybody wants to have read and nobody wants to read.
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