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Ignorance is not not knowin' - Ignorance is knowin' what ain't so.

Mark Twain

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Mark Twain
Age: 74 †
Born: 1835
Born: November 30
Died: 1910
Died: April 21
Aphorist
Author
Autobiographer
Humorist
Journalist
Novelist
Opinion Journalist
Prosaist
Science Fiction Writer
Teacher
Florida
Missouri
Samuel Langhorne Clemens
Samuel L. Clemens
Samuel Clemens
Knowin
Atheism
Ignorance
Religion

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There are two things nobody should ever have to watch being made, sausage and laws.
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Anyone who can only think of one way to spell a word obviously lacks imagination.
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Strip the human race, absolutely naked, and it would be a real democracy. But the introduction of even a rag of tiger skin, or a cowtail, could make a badge of distinction and be the beginning of a monarchy.
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[I] shall never use profanity except in discussing house rent and taxes. Indeed, upon second thought, I will not use it then, for it is unchristian, inelegant, and degrading--though to speak truly I do not see how house rent and taxes are going to be discussed worth a cent without it.
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...nothing so liberalizes a man and expands the kindly instincts that nature put in him as travel and contact with many kinds of people.
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A person who won't read has no advantage over one who can't read.
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Always acknowledge a fault. This will throw those in authority off their guard and give you an opportunity to commit more.
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A dozen direct censures are easier to bear than one morganatic compliment.
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The man who is ostentatious of his modesty is twin to the statue that wears a fig-leaf.
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Everyone is a moon, and has a dark side which he never shows to anybody.
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We wish to learn all the curious, outlandish ways of all the different countries, so that we can show off and astonish people when we get home. We wish to excite the envy of our untraveled friends with our strange foreign fashions which we can't shake off.
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The xmas holidays have this high value: that they remind Forgetters of the Forgotten, & repair damaged relationships.
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Experience, the only logic sure to convince a diseased imagination and restore it to rugged health.
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It's spring fever. That is what the name of it is. And when you've got it, you want—oh, you don't quite know what it is you do want, but it just fairly makes your heart ache, you want it so!
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But old fools is the biggest fools there is.
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When your friends begin to flatter you on how young you look, it's a sure sign you're getting old.
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When you feel like tellin a feller to go to the devil - tell him to go to Chicago - it'll anser every purpose, and is perhaps, a leetle more expensive.
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The unexamined life may not be worth living, but the life too closely examined may not be lived at all.
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When grown-up persons indulge in practical jokes, the fact gauges them. They have lived narrow, obscure, and ignorant lives, and at full manhood they still retain and cherish a job lot of left-over standards and ideals that would have been discarded with their boyhood if they had then moved out into the world and a broader life.
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Courage is not the absence of fear, but the mastery of it.
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