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Damn the subjunctive. It brings all our writers to shame.
Mark Twain
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Mark Twain
Age: 74 †
Born: 1835
Born: November 30
Died: 1910
Died: April 21
Aphorist
Author
Autobiographer
Humorist
Journalist
Novelist
Opinion Journalist
Prosaist
Science Fiction Writer
Teacher
Florida
Missouri
Samuel Langhorne Clemens
Samuel L. Clemens
Samuel Clemens
Subjunctive
Grammar
Damn
Brings
Shame
Writers
More quotes by Mark Twain
To be, or not to be that is the bare bodkin That makes calamity of so long life.
Mark Twain
When whole races and peoples conspire to propagate gigantic mute lies in the interest of tyrannies and shams, why should we care anything about the trifling lies told by individuals?
Mark Twain
They all laid their heads together like as many lawyers when they are gettin' ready to prove that a man's heirs ain't got any right to his property.
Mark Twain
Do something everyday that you don't want to do this is the golden rule for acquiring the habit of doing your duty without pain.
Mark Twain
I have never examined the subject of humor until now. I am surprised to find how much ground it covers. I have got its divisions and frontiers down on a piece of paper. I find it defined as a production of the brain, as the power of the brain to produce something humorous, and the capacity of percieving humor.
Mark Twain
Wrinkles should merely indicate where smiles have been.
Mark Twain
The dog is a gentleman I hope to go to his heaven not man's.
Mark Twain
Being rich ain't what it's cracked up to be. It's just worry and worry, and sweat and sweat, and a-wishing you was dead all the time.
Mark Twain
Each of you, for himself, by himself and on his own responsibility, must speak.
Mark Twain
I admire him, I frankly confess it and when his time is come I shall buy a piece of the rope for a keepsake.
Mark Twain
There is no God, no universe, no human race, no earthly life, no heaven, no hell. It is all a dream, a grotesque and foolish dream. Nothing exists but you. And you are but a thought -a vagrant thought, a useless thought, a homeless thought, wandering forlorn among the empty eternities!
Mark Twain
All men are ignorant, just on different subjects.
Mark Twain
I am dead to adverbs they cannot excite me. To misplace an adverb is a thing which I am able to do with frozen indifference it can never give me a pang. There are subtleties which I cannot master at all - they confuse me, they mean absolutely nothing to me - and this adverb plague is one of them.
Mark Twain
Is a person's public and private opinion the same? It is thought there have been instances.
Mark Twain
A newspaper is not just for reporting the news as it is, but to make people mad enough to do something about it.
Mark Twain
Sometimes too much to drink is barely enough.
Mark Twain
A man who carries a cat by the tail is getting experience that will always be helpful. He isn't likely to grow dim or doubtful. Chances are, he isn't likely to carry the cat that way again, either. But if he wants to, I say let him!
Mark Twain
It takes me a long time to lose my temper, but once lost I could not find it with a dog.
Mark Twain
The work that is really a man's own work is play and not work at all.
Mark Twain
It is not worth while to try to keep history from repeating itself, for man's character will always make the preventing of the repetitions impossible.
Mark Twain
