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Damn the subjunctive. It brings all our writers to shame.
Mark Twain
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Mark Twain
Age: 74 †
Born: 1835
Born: November 30
Died: 1910
Died: April 21
Aphorist
Author
Autobiographer
Humorist
Journalist
Novelist
Opinion Journalist
Prosaist
Science Fiction Writer
Teacher
Florida
Missouri
Samuel Langhorne Clemens
Samuel L. Clemens
Samuel Clemens
Subjunctive
Grammar
Damn
Brings
Shame
Writers
More quotes by Mark Twain
There are those who would misteach us that to stick in a rut is consistency - and a virtue, and that to climb out of the rut is inconsistency - and a vice.
Mark Twain
The only difference between a tax man and a taxidermist is that the taxidermist leaves the skin.
Mark Twain
It is my custom to keep on talking until I get the audience cowed.
Mark Twain
The ordinary chestnut can beget a sickly and reluctant laugh, but it takes a horse chestnut to fetch the gorgeous big horse-laugh.
Mark Twain
Creed and opinion change with time, and their symbols perish but Literature and its temples are sacred to all creeds and inviolate.
Mark Twain
I have always been rather better treated in San Francisco than I actually deserved.
Mark Twain
By and by when each nation has 20,000 battleships and 5,000,000 soldiers we shall all be safe and the wisdom of statesmanship will stand confirmed.
Mark Twain
It was wonderful to find America, but it would have been more wonderful to miss it.
Mark Twain
When a library expels a book of mine and leaves an unexpurgated Bible lying around where unprotected youth and age can get hold of it, the deep unconscious irony of it delights me and doesn't anger me.
Mark Twain
The average American's simplest and commonest form of breakfast consists of coffee and beefsteak.
Mark Twain
A good memory and a tongue tied in the middle is a combination which gives immortality to conversation.
Mark Twain
It takes some little time to accept and realize the fact that while you have been growing old, your friends have not been standing still, in that matter.
Mark Twain
Total abstinence is so excellent a thing that it cannot be carried to too great an extent. In my passion for it I even carry it so far as to totally abstain from total abstinence itself.
Mark Twain
I'm the only person who has ever found the right way to build an autobiography.
Mark Twain
Give a man a reputation as an early riser and he can sleep 'til noon.
Mark Twain
The introduction of homeopathy forced the old school doctor to stir around and learn something of a rational nature about his business. You may honestly feel grateful that homeopathy survived the attempts of the allopaths to destroy it.
Mark Twain
Only he who has seen better days and lives to see better days again knows their full value.
Mark Twain
The time to begin writing an article is when you have finished it to your satisfaction. By that time you begin to clearly and logically perceive what it is you really want to say.
Mark Twain
This is the year 1492. I am eighty-two years of age. The things I am going to tell you are things which I saw myself as a child and as a youth.
Mark Twain
The truth is a precious commodity. That's why I use it so sparingly.
Mark Twain
