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Never do wrong when people are looking.

Mark Twain

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Mark Twain
Age: 74 †
Born: 1835
Born: November 30
Died: 1910
Died: April 21
Aphorist
Author
Autobiographer
Humorist
Journalist
Novelist
Opinion Journalist
Prosaist
Science Fiction Writer
Teacher
Florida
Missouri
Samuel Langhorne Clemens
Samuel L. Clemens
Samuel Clemens
People
Looking
Wrong
Never

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Every man is a moon and has a side which he turns toward nobody: you have to slip around behind it if you want to see it.
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Every generalization is dangerous, especially this one.
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Agassiz does recommend authors to eat fish, because the phosphorus in it makes brains. But I cannot help you to a decision about the amount you need to eat. Perhaps a couple of whales would be enough.
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A wise man does not waste so good a commodity as lying for naught.
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Distance lends enchantment to the view.
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Yes, even I am dishonest. Not in many ways, but in some. Forty-one, I think it is.
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If we should deal out justice only, in this world, who would escape? No, it is better to be generous, and in the end more profitable, for it gains gratitude for us, and love.
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What ought to be done to the man who invented the celebrating of anniversaries? Mere killing would be too light.
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It's spring fever. That is what the name of it is. And when you've got it, you want—oh, you don't quite know what it is you do want, but it just fairly makes your heart ache, you want it so!
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No man that has ever lived has done a thing to please God--primarily. It was done to please himself, then God next.
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That optimist of yours is always ready to turn hell's backyard into a play-ground.
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It is the will of God that we must have critics, and missionaries, and Congressmen, and humorists, and we must bear the burden. Meantime, I seem to have been drifting into criticism myself. But that is nothing. At the worst, criticism is nothing more than a crime, and I am not unused to that.
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I was a-trembling, because I'd got to decide, forever, betwixt two things, and I knowed it.
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The radical of one century is the conservative of the next. The radical invents the views. When he has worn them out, the conservative adopt.
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Praise is well, compliment is well, but affection-that is the last and most precious reward that any man can win, whether by character or achievement.
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All you drunkards: Put down the intoxicating Vanity Metrics.
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All saints can do miracles, but few of them can keep a hotel.
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Jesus died to save men - a small thing for an immortal to do - and didn't save many, anyway. But if he had been damned for the race, that would have been act of a size proper to a god, and would have saved the whole race.
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He [George Washington Cable] has taught me to abhor and detest the Sabbath day and hunt up new and troublesome ways to dishonor it.
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The peoples furthest from civilization are the ones where equality between man and woman are furthest apart-and we consider this one of the signs of savagery.
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