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Man can seldom - very, very, seldom - fight a winning fight against his training the odds are too heavy.

Mark Twain

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Mark Twain
Age: 74 †
Born: 1835
Born: November 30
Died: 1910
Died: April 21
Aphorist
Author
Autobiographer
Humorist
Journalist
Novelist
Opinion Journalist
Prosaist
Science Fiction Writer
Teacher
Florida
Missouri
Samuel Langhorne Clemens
Samuel L. Clemens
Samuel Clemens
Education
Winning
Fighting
Men
Odds
Seldom
Heavy
Training
Fight

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Doesn't make any difference who we are or what we are, there's always somebody to look down on.
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We all live in the protection of certain cowardices which we call our principles.
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Constellations have always been troublesome things to name. If you give one of them a fanciful name, it will always refuse to live up to it it will always persist in not resembling the thing it has been named for.
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For we were little Christian children and early learned the value of forbidden fruit.
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It is hard enough luck being a monarch, without being a target also.
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Education is what you must acquire without any interference from your schooling.
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I bring you this stately matron named Christendom, returning bedraggled, besmirched, and dishonored from pirate raids in Kiao-Chow, Manchuria, South Africa, and the Phillipines, with her soul full of meanness, her pocket full of boodle, and her mouth full of pious hypocrisies. Give her soap and a towel, but hide the looking-glass.
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There has never been a Protestant boy nor a Protestant girl whose mind the Bible has not soiled.
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A crowded police docket is the surest of all signs that trade is brisk and money plenty.
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If a spectacle is going to be particularly imposing I prefer to see it through somebody else's eyes, because that man will always exaggerate. Then I can exaggerate his exaggeration, and my account of the thing will be the most impressive.
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Vote: The only commodity that is peddleable without a license.
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The nation is divided, half patriots and half traitors, and no man can tell which from which.
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We are strange beings, we seem to go free, but we go in chains - chains of training, custom, convention, association, environment - in a word, Circumstance, and against these bonds the strongest of us struggle in vain.
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What a good thing Adam had. When he said a good thing he knew nobody had said it before.
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Morals are not the important thing-nor enlightenment-nor civilization. A man can do absolutely well without them, but he can't do without something to eat. The supremest thing is the need of the body, not of the mind and spirit.
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Figures often beguile me, particularly when I have the arranging of them myself in which case the remark attributed to Disraeli would often apply with justice and force: There are three kinds of lies: lies, damned lies, and statistics.
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Cats are the wildest of the tame and the tamest of the wild
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Man is without doubt the most interesting fool there is. He concedes that God made the angels immune from pain and death, and that he could have been similarly kind to man, but denies that he was under any moral obligation to do so.
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I am opposed to millionaires, but it would be dangerous to offer me the position.
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Grief can take care if itself, but to get the full value of a joy you must have somebody to divide it with.
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