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I could never learn to like her, except on a raft at sea with no other provisions in sight.
Mark Twain
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Mark Twain
Age: 74 †
Born: 1835
Born: November 30
Died: 1910
Died: April 21
Aphorist
Author
Autobiographer
Humorist
Journalist
Novelist
Opinion Journalist
Prosaist
Science Fiction Writer
Teacher
Florida
Missouri
Samuel Langhorne Clemens
Samuel L. Clemens
Samuel Clemens
Like
Sarcastic
Sea
Sight
Except
Personality
Inspiration
Raft
Learn
Provisions
Never
Provision
More quotes by Mark Twain
To me [Edgar Allen Poe's] prose is unreadable—like Jane Austin's [sic]. No there is a difference. I could read his prose on salary, but not Jane's. Jane is entirely impossible. It seems a great pity that they allowed her to die a natural death.
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One can enjoy a rainbow without necessarily forgetting the forces that made it.
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If we only had some God in the country's laws, instead of being in such a sweat to get him into the Constitution, it would be better all around.
Mark Twain
It takes some little time to accept and realize the fact that while you have been growing old, your friends have not been standing still, in that matter.
Mark Twain
If Christ were here now there is one thing he would not be — a Christian.
Mark Twain
Experience of life (not of books) is the only capital usable in such a book as you have attempted one can make no judicious use of this capital while it is new.
Mark Twain
There are people who think that honesty is always the best policy. This is a superstition. There are times when the appearance of it is worth six of it.
Mark Twain
Two days overdue, THE WORLD'S WORK has not reached me. Pray make a note of this. I would rather not have to resort to violence.
Mark Twain
You can't throw too much style into a miracle.
Mark Twain
The altar cloth of one aeon is the doormat of the next.
Mark Twain
Most people can't bear to sit in church for an hour on Sundays. How are they supposed to live somewhere very similar to it for eternity?
Mark Twain
Such is professional jealousy a scientist will never show any kindness for a theory which he did not start himself.
Mark Twain
I am dead to adverbs they cannot excite me. To misplace an adverb is a thing which I am able to do with frozen indifference it can never give me a pang. There are subtleties which I cannot master at all - they confuse me, they mean absolutely nothing to me - and this adverb plague is one of them.
Mark Twain
If you take epitaphs seriously, we ought to bury the living and resurrect the dead.
Mark Twain
When I am king they shall not have bread and shelter only, but also teachings out of books, for a full belly is little worth where the mind is starved.
Mark Twain
Persons attempting to find a motive in this narrative will be prosecuted persons attempting to find a moral in it will be banished persons attempting to find a plot in it will be shot. BY ORDER OF THE AUTHOR per G.G., CHIEF OF ORDNANCE
Mark Twain
A man's character may be learned from the adjectives which he habitually uses in conversation.
Mark Twain
We have not the reverent feeling for the rainbow that the savage has, because we know how it is made. We have lost as much as we gained by prying into that matter.
Mark Twain
India is, the cradle of the human race, the birthplace of human speech, the mother of history, the grandmother of legend, and the great grand mother of tradition. our most valuable and most instructive materials in the history of man are treasured up in India only.
Mark Twain
My mother had a great deal of trouble with me, but I think she enjoyed it.
Mark Twain
