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We despise no source that can pay us a pleasing attention.

Mark Twain

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Mark Twain
Age: 74 †
Born: 1835
Born: November 30
Died: 1910
Died: April 21
Aphorist
Author
Autobiographer
Humorist
Journalist
Novelist
Opinion Journalist
Prosaist
Science Fiction Writer
Teacher
Florida
Missouri
Samuel Langhorne Clemens
Samuel L. Clemens
Samuel Clemens
Pleasing
Flattery
Despise
Pay
Source
Attention

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A sense of humor is the one thing no one will admit to not having.
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You can't depend on your eyes when your imagination is out of focus.
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I like Joan of Arc best of all my books and it is the best I know it perfectly well.
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The radical of one century is the conservative of the next. The radical invents the views. When he has worn them out, the conservative adopt.
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The introduction of homeopathy forced the old school doctor to stir around and learn something of a rational nature about his business. You may honestly feel grateful that homeopathy survived the attempts of the allopaths to destroy it.
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I've dealt with many crises in my life, but few will ever happen.
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Always obey your parents - when they are present.
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There is no such thing as the Queen's English. The property has gone into the hands of a joint stock company and we own the bulk of the shares!
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I was educated once - it took me years to get over it.
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Each man must for himself alone decide what is right and what is wrong, which course is patriotic and which isn't. You cannot shirk this and be a man. To decide against your conviction is to be an unqualified and excusable traitor, both to yourself and to your country, let men label you as they may.
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I wasn't worth a cent two years ago, and now I owe two million dollars.
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None of us can have as many virtues as the fountain-pen, or half its cussedness but we can try.
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Except a person be part coward, it is not a compliment to say he is brave.
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Go to bed early, get up early-this is wise.
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Shall we go on conferring our Civilization upon the peoples that sit in darkness, or shall we give those poor things a rest?
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There is nothing in the world like a persuasive speech to fuddle the mental apparatus and upset the convictions and debauch the emotions of an audience not practiced in the tricks and delusions of oratory
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The fact is, the king was a good deal more than a king, he was a man and when a man is a man, you can't knock it out of him.
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The peoples furthest from civilization are the ones where equality between man and woman are furthest apart-and we consider this one of the signs of savagery.
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Heaven goes by favor. If it went by merit, you would stay out and your dog would go in.
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To string incongruities and absurdities together in a wandering and sometimes purposeless way, and seem innocently unaware that they are absurdities, is the basis of the American art, if my position is correct.
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