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When I was fourteen years old, I was amazed at how unintelligent my father was. By the time I turned twenty-one, I was astounded how much he had learned in the last seven years.
Mark Twain
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Mark Twain
Age: 74 †
Born: 1835
Born: November 30
Died: 1910
Died: April 21
Aphorist
Author
Autobiographer
Humorist
Journalist
Novelist
Opinion Journalist
Prosaist
Science Fiction Writer
Teacher
Florida
Missouri
Samuel Langhorne Clemens
Samuel L. Clemens
Samuel Clemens
Science
Twenties
Much
Turned
Years
Seven
Time
Learned
Unintelligent
Age
Astounded
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Fourteen
Last
Amazed
Father
Twenty
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A round man cannot be expected to fit in a square hole right away. He must have time to modify his shape.
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Familiarity breeds contempt. How accurate that is. The reason we hold truth in such respect is because we have so little opportunity to get familiar with it.
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The older I get, the more clearly I remember things that never happened.
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The Book of Mormon is chloroform in print
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The art of prophecy is very difficult, especially with respect to the future.
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Now is the accepted time to make your regular annual good resolutions. Next week you can begin paving hell with them as usual.
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Alas! those good old days are gone, when a murderer could wipe the stain from his name and soothe his trouble to sleep simply by getting out his blocks and mortar and building an addition to a church.
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Politicians, old buildings, and prostitutes become respectable with age.
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Everyone is a moon, and has a dark side which he never shows to anybody.
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I have never examined the subject of humor until now. I am surprised to find how much ground it covers. I have got its divisions and frontiers down on a piece of paper. I find it defined as a production of the brain, as the power of the brain to produce something humorous, and the capacity of percieving humor.
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A person who won't read has no advantage over one who can't read.
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I have seen slower people than I am and more deliberate... and even quieter, and more listless, and lazier people than I am. But they were dead.
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When the time comes that a man has had his dinner, then the true man comes to the surface
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To place man properly at the present time, he stands somewhere between the angels and the French.
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Let us be grateful to Adam: he cut us out of the blessing of idleness and won for us the curse of labor.
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I didn't attend the funeral, but I sent a nice letter saying I approved of it.
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