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How stunning are the changes which age makes in a man while he sleeps!

Mark Twain

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Mark Twain
Age: 74 †
Born: 1835
Born: November 30
Died: 1910
Died: April 21
Aphorist
Author
Autobiographer
Humorist
Journalist
Novelist
Opinion Journalist
Prosaist
Science Fiction Writer
Teacher
Florida
Missouri
Samuel Langhorne Clemens
Samuel L. Clemens
Samuel Clemens
Makes
Men
Sleeps
Stunning
Changes
Sleep
Age

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I was seldom able to see an opportunity until it had ceased to be one.
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The new political gospel: public office is private graft.
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I've never let my school interfere with my education.
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How easy it is to make people believe a lie, and [how] hard it is to undo that work again!
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My advice to girls: first, don't smoke - to excess second, don't drink - to excess third, don't marry - to excess.
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It's not the parts of the Bible I don't know that worries me...it's the parts that I do.
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I admire him, I frankly confess it and when his time is come I shall buy a piece of the rope for a keepsake.
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Imagine, if you will, that I am an idiot. Then, imagine that I am also a Congressman. But, alas, I repeat myself.
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Suppose you were an idiot, and suppose you were a member of Congress but I repeat myself.
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It may have happened, it may not have happened but it could have happened.
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Well, no doubt it's a blessed thing to have an imagination that can always make you satisfied, no matter how you are fixed.
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Heroine: Girl in a book who is saved from drowning by a hero and marries him next week, but if it was to be over again ten years later it is likely she would rather have a life-belt and he would rather have her have it. Hero: Person in a book who does things which he can't and girl marries him for it.
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Children have but little charity for one another's defects
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Religion consists in a set of things which the average man thinks he believes and wishes he was certain of.
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No throne exists that has a right to exist, and no symbol of it, flying from any flagstaff, is righteously entitled to wear any device but the skull and crossbones of that kindred industry which differs from royalty only businesswise-merely as retail differs from wholesale.
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All say, ‘how hard it is that we have to die’ -- a strange complaint to come from the mouths of those who have had to live.
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I wrote 'Tom Sawyer' and 'Huck Finn' for adults exclusively, and it always distressed me when I find that boys and girls have been allowed access to them. The mind that becomes soiled in youth can never again be washed clean.
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Man can seldom - very, very, seldom - fight a winning fight against his training the odds are too heavy.
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Is the human race a joke? Was it devised and patched together in a dull time when there was nothing important to do?
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It's easy to make friends, but hard to get rid of them.
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