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Truth is more of a stranger than fiction.
Mark Twain
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Mark Twain
Age: 74 †
Born: 1835
Born: November 30
Died: 1910
Died: April 21
Aphorist
Author
Autobiographer
Humorist
Journalist
Novelist
Opinion Journalist
Prosaist
Science Fiction Writer
Teacher
Florida
Missouri
Samuel Langhorne Clemens
Samuel L. Clemens
Samuel Clemens
Stranger
Fiction
Truth
More quotes by Mark Twain
In my experience, previously counted chickens never do hatch.
Mark Twain
Humor, to be comprehensible to anybody, must be built upon a foundation with which he is familiar. If he can't see the foundation the superstructure is to him merely a freak -- like the Flatiron building without any visible means of support -- something that ought to be arrested.
Mark Twain
All Congresses and Parliaments have a kindly feeling for idiots, and a compassion for them, on account of personal experience and heredity.
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Good friends, good books and a sleepy conscience: this is the ideal life.
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I speak French with timidity, and not flowingly--except when excited. When using that language I have often noticed that I have hardly ever been mistaken for a Frenchman, except, perhaps, by horses never, I believe, by people.
Mark Twain
The human race has one really effective weapon, and that is laughter.
Mark Twain
The xmas holidays have this high value: that they remind Forgetters of the Forgotten, & repair damaged relationships.
Mark Twain
A group of men in evening clothes looks like a flock of crows, and is just about as inspiring.
Mark Twain
The humorous writer professes to awaken and direct your love, your pity, your kindness--your scorn for untruth, pretension, imposture....He takes upon himself to be the week-day preacher.
Mark Twain
Some things you can't find out but you will never know you can't by guessing and supposing: no, you have to be patient and go on experimenting until you find out that you can't find out.
Mark Twain
He had only one vanity he thought he could give advice better than any other person.
Mark Twain
He gossips habitually he lacks the common wisdom to keep still that deadly enemy of man, his own tongue.
Mark Twain
How far we travel in life matters far less than those we meet along the way.
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Choosing not to read is like closing an open door to paradise
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The difference between a Miracle and a Fact is exactly the difference between a mermaid and a seal.
Mark Twain
The only way to keep your health is to eat what you don't want, drink what you don't like, and do what you'd rather not.
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We all like to see people sea-sick when we are not ourselves.
Mark Twain
My mind changes often ... People who have no mind can easily be steadfast and firm, but when a man is loaded down to the guards with it, as I am, every heavy sea of foreboding or inclination, maybe of indolence, shifts the cargo.
Mark Twain
The election makes me think of a story of a man who was dying. He had only two minutes to live, so he sent for a clergyman and asked him, Where is the best place to go to? He was undecided about it. So the minister told him that each place had its advantages--heaven for climate, and hell for society.
Mark Twain
God cures and the doctor sends the bill.
Mark Twain
