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Now is the accepted time to make your regular annual good resolutions. Next week you can begin paving hell with them as usual.
Mark Twain
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Mark Twain
Age: 74 †
Born: 1835
Born: November 30
Died: 1910
Died: April 21
Aphorist
Author
Autobiographer
Humorist
Journalist
Novelist
Opinion Journalist
Prosaist
Science Fiction Writer
Teacher
Florida
Missouri
Samuel Langhorne Clemens
Samuel L. Clemens
Samuel Clemens
Funny
Annual
Science
Regular
Inspirational
Resolution
Next
Usual
Years
Accepted
Make
Begin
Paving
Good
Week
Resolutions
Time
Hell
Annuals
More quotes by Mark Twain
When we remember we are all mad, the mysteries disappear and life stands explained.
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More than once I have been humiliated by my resemblance to God the father He is always longing for the love of His children and trying to get it on the cheapest and laziest terms He can invent.
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Few of us stand prosperity another man's I mean.
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Most of the things I worried about in life never happened.
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To be good is noble but to show others how to be good is nobler and no trouble.
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The equator was wisely put where it is, because if it had been run through Europe all the kings would have tried to grab it.
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Life is but a dream, a grotesque and foolish dream.
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I can understand German as well as the maniac that invented it, but I talk it best through an interpreter.
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And so I am become a knight of the Kingdom of Dreams and Shadows
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If all men were rich, all men would be poor.
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It is curious and interesting to notice what an attraction a fussy, mincing, nickel-plated word has for you.
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Always tell the truth then you don't have to remember anything
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Indecency, vulgarity, obscenity - these are strictly confined to man he invented them. Among the higher animals there is no trace of them. They hide nothing. They are not ashamed.
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Creed and opinion change with time, and their symbols perish but Literature and its temples are sacred to all creeds and inviolate.
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It is strange the way the ignorant and inexperienced so often and so undeservedly succeed when the informed and the experienced fail.
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When I take up one of Jane Austen's books ... I feel like a barkeep entering the kingdom of heaven. I know what his sensation would be and his private comments. He would not find the place to his taste, and he would probably say so.
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Name the greatest of all inventors. Accident.
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The North thinks it knows how to make corn bread, but this is a gross superstition. Perhaps no bread in the world is quite as good as Southern corn bread, and perhaps no bread in the world is quite as bad as the Northern imitation of it.
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