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To get the full value of joy You must have someone to divide it with. After all these years I see that I was mistaken about Eve in the beginning it is better to live outside the Garden with her than inside it without her.

Mark Twain

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Mark Twain
Age: 74 †
Born: 1835
Born: November 30
Died: 1910
Died: April 21
Aphorist
Author
Autobiographer
Humorist
Journalist
Novelist
Opinion Journalist
Prosaist
Science Fiction Writer
Teacher
Florida
Missouri
Samuel Langhorne Clemens
Samuel L. Clemens
Samuel Clemens
Life
Full
Divides
Values
Mistaken
Someone
Garden
Better
Beginning
Live
Outside
Without
Value
Must
Inside
Years
Joy
Divide

More quotes by Mark Twain

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I bring you this stately matron named Christendom, returning bedraggled, besmirched, and dishonored from pirate raids in Kiao-Chow, Manchuria, South Africa, and the Phillipines, with her soul full of meanness, her pocket full of boodle, and her mouth full of pious hypocrisies. Give her soap and a towel, but hide the looking-glass.
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The best way to cheer yourself up is to try to cheer somebody else up.
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The altar cloth of one aeon is the doormat of the next.
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We are strange beings, we seem to go free, but we go in chains - chains of training, custom, convention, association, environment - in a word, Circumstance, and against these bonds the strongest of us struggle in vain.
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I have done more for San Francisco than any of its old residents. Since I left there it has increased in population fully 300,000. I could have done more - I could have gone earlier - it was suggested.
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That optimist of yours is always ready to turn hell's backyard into a play-ground.
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What would men be without women? Scarce, sir...mighty scarce.
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One learns peoples through the heart, not the eyes or the intellect.
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While the rest of the species is descended from apes, redheads are descended from cats.
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Give a man a reputation as an early riser and he can sleep 'til noon.
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There are those who would misteach us that to stick in a rut is consistency - and a virtue, and that to climb out of the rut is inconsistency - and a vice.
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It is a good and gentle religion, but inconvenient.
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Are you so unobservant as not to have found out that sanity and happiness are an impossible combination?
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Everybody lies...every day, every hour, awake, asleep, in his dreams, in his joy, in his mourning. If he keeps his tongue still his hands, his feet, his eyes, his attitude will convey deception.
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I like a good story well told. That is the reason I am sometimes forced to tell them myself.
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Hero: Person in a book who does things which he can't and girl marries him for it.
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I have been studying the traits and dispositions of the lower animals (so called) and contrasting them with the traits and dispositions of man. I find the result humiliating to me.
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When the end of the world comes, I want to be in Kentucky, because everything there happens 20 years after it happens anywhere else.
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God rewards gamblers and fools. The crucial thing, when you win, is knowing which you were.
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The humorous writer professes to awaken and direct your love, your pity, your kindness--your scorn for untruth, pretension, imposture....He takes upon himself to be the week-day preacher.
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