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For all the talk you hear about knowledge being such a wonderful thing, instinct is worth forty of it for real unerringness.

Mark Twain

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Mark Twain
Age: 74 †
Born: 1835
Born: November 30
Died: 1910
Died: April 21
Aphorist
Author
Autobiographer
Humorist
Journalist
Novelist
Opinion Journalist
Prosaist
Science Fiction Writer
Teacher
Florida
Missouri
Samuel Langhorne Clemens
Samuel L. Clemens
Samuel Clemens
Hear
Wonderful
Talk
Knowledge
Real
Forty
Thing
Intuition
Instinct
Worth

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I don't like to commit myself about heaven and hell - you see, I have friends in both places.
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The good Lord didn't create anything without a purpose, but the fly comes close.
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Now, isn't imagination a precious thing? It peoples the earth with all manner of wonders.
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Part of the secret of a success in life is to eat what you like and let the food fight it out inside.
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Unused talents gives you no advantage over someone who has no talent at all.
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How stunning are the changes which age makes in a man while he sleeps!
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I never write Metropolis for seven cents because I can get the same price for city. I never write policeman because I can get the same money for cop.
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People who love sausage and respect the law should never watch either being made.
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It is the will of God that we must have critics, and missionaries, and Congressmen, and humorists, and we must bear the burden. Meantime, I seem to have been drifting into criticism myself. But that is nothing. At the worst, criticism is nothing more than a crime, and I am not unused to that.
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At noon I observed a bevy of nude young native women bathing in the sea, and I went and sat down on their clothes to keep them from being stolen.
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Of the delights of this world man cares most for sexual intercourse.
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In my experience, previously counted chickens never do hatch.
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I knew a man who grabbed a cat by the tail and learned forty percent more about cats than the man who didn't.
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Probably there is an imperceptible touch of something permanent that one feels instinctively to adhere to true humour, whereas wit may be the mere conversational shooting up of smartness--a bright feather, to be blown into space the second after it is launched...Wit seems to be counted a very poor relation to Humour....Humour is never artifici
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The laws of Nature take precedence of all human laws. The purpose of all human laws is one - to defeat the laws of Nature. This is the case among all the nations, both civilized and savage. It is a grotesquerie, but when the human race is not grotesque it is because it is asleep and losing its opportunity.
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I never can think of Judas Iscariot without losing my temper. To my mind Judas Iscariot was nothing but a low, mean, premature, Congressman.
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I was standing in our dining-room thinking of nothing in particular, when a cablegram was put into my hand. It said, 'Susy was peacefully released today.' It is one of the mysteries of our nature that a man, all unprepared, can receive a thunder-stroke like that and live.
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The law is a system that protects everybody who can afford to hire a good lawyer.
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There are two types of speakers: those that are nervous and those that are liars.
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Honest poverty is a gem that even a king might be proud to call his own - but I wish to sell out
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