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Humor is the great thing, the saving thing after all. The minute it crops up, all our hardnesses yield, all our irritations, and resentments flit away, and a sunny spirit takes their place.
Mark Twain
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Mark Twain
Age: 74 †
Born: 1835
Born: November 30
Died: 1910
Died: April 21
Aphorist
Author
Autobiographer
Humorist
Journalist
Novelist
Opinion Journalist
Prosaist
Science Fiction Writer
Teacher
Florida
Missouri
Samuel Langhorne Clemens
Samuel L. Clemens
Samuel Clemens
Saving
Flit
Great
Minute
Resentments
Thing
Humor
Hardness
Minutes
Irritation
Takes
Crops
Sunny
Away
Resentment
Spirit
Yield
Irritations
Place
More quotes by Mark Twain
There are some few people I respect and admire, but I don't think much of the species.
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My father was a Saint Bernard, my mother was a Collie, but I am a Presbyterian.
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I am losing enough sleep to supply a worn-out army.
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Congress: America's only true criminal class.
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There is a great difference between feeding parties to wild beasts and stirring up their finer feelings in an inquisition. One is the system of degraded barbarians, the other of enlightened civilized people.
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Always do what is right. It will gratify half of mankind and astound the other.
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There's always a hole in theories somewhere if you look close enough.
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Work consists of whatever a body is obliged to do. Play consists of whatever a body is not obliged to do.
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I had longed to be a butterfly, and I was one at last. I attended private parties in sumptuous evening dress, simpered and aired my graces like a born beau, and polkaed and schoisched with a step peculiar to myself - and the kangaroo.
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In God We Trust. It is the choicest compliment that has ever been paid us, and the most gratifying to our feelings. It is simple, direct, gracefully phrased it always sounds well - In God We Trust. I don't believe it would sound any better if it were true.
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For we were little Christian children and early learned the value of forbidden fruit.
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Humor is like a frog if you dissect it, it dies.
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Damn these human beings if I had invented them I would go hide my head in a bag.
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A good lawyer knows the law a clever one takes the judge to lunch.
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None of us can be as great as God, but any of us can be as good.
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There will never be a perfect time to quit smoking. A time when you don't have any distractions or stress... If you had started today one year ago, this would not even be an issue for you today! Don't waste another year!
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The radical of one century is the conservative of the next. The radical invents the views. When he has worn them out, the conservative adopt.
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No man that has ever lived has done a thing to please God--primarily. It was done to please himself, then God next.
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Ours is the land of the free-nobody denies that-nobody challenges it. (Maybe it is because we won't let other people testify.)
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We find not much in ourselves to admire, we are always privately wanting to be like somebody else. If everybody was satisfied with himself, there would be no heroes
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