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The funniest things are the forbidden.

Mark Twain

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Mark Twain
Age: 74 †
Born: 1835
Born: November 30
Died: 1910
Died: April 21
Aphorist
Author
Autobiographer
Humorist
Journalist
Novelist
Opinion Journalist
Prosaist
Science Fiction Writer
Teacher
Florida
Missouri
Samuel Langhorne Clemens
Samuel L. Clemens
Samuel Clemens
Funny
Things
Humorists
Funniest
Forbidden
Novelists
Humorous
Humor
Fun

More quotes by Mark Twain

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The minute we get reconciled to a person, how willing we are to throw aside little needless punctilios and pronounce his name right.
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Life is but a dream, a grotesque and foolish dream.
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Names are not always what they seem.
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One thing at a time, is my motto - and just play that thing for all it is worth, even if it's only tto pair and a jack.
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Humorists of the 'mere' sort cannot survive. Humor is only a fragrance, a decoration.
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We should be careful to get out of an experience only the wisdom that is in it and stop there lest we be like the cat that sits down on a hot stove lid. She will never sit down on a hot stove lid again and that is well but also she will never sit down on a cold one anymore.
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I could forgive the boy, now, if he'd committed a million sins!
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Now, isn't imagination a precious thing? It peoples the earth with all manner of wonders.
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Make your vacation your vocation.
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All good things arrive unto them that wait - and don't die in the meantime.
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A banquet is probably the most fatiguing thing in the world except ditchdigging. It is the insanest of all recreations. The inventor of it overlooked no detail that could furnish weariness, distress, harassment, and acute and long-sustained misery of mind and body.
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I don't see any use in having a uniform and arbitrary way of spelling words. We might as well make all clothes alike and cook all dishes alike. Sameness is tiresome variety is pleasing.
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I didn't have time to write a short letter, so I wrote a long one instead.
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Man is without doubt the most interesting fool there is. He concedes that God made the angels immune from pain and death, and that he could have been similarly kind to man, but denies that he was under any moral obligation to do so.
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Never argue with people who buy ink by the gallon.
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Surely the ass who invented the first religion ought to be the first ass damned
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Switzerland is simply a large, lumpy, solid rock with a thin skin of grass stretched over it.
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A round man cannot be expected to fit in a square hole right away. He must have time to modify his shape.
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It’s not the good that die young, it’s the lucky.
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My axiom is, to succeed in business: avoid my example.
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