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The funniest things are the forbidden.
Mark Twain
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Mark Twain
Age: 74 †
Born: 1835
Born: November 30
Died: 1910
Died: April 21
Aphorist
Author
Autobiographer
Humorist
Journalist
Novelist
Opinion Journalist
Prosaist
Science Fiction Writer
Teacher
Florida
Missouri
Samuel Langhorne Clemens
Samuel L. Clemens
Samuel Clemens
Humor
Fun
Funny
Things
Humorists
Funniest
Forbidden
Novelists
Humorous
More quotes by Mark Twain
God made the Idiot for practice, and then He made the School Board.
Mark Twain
A powerful agent is the right word: it lights the reader's way and makes it plain.
Mark Twain
Apparently there is nothing that cannot happen today.
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The report of my death was an exaggeration.
Mark Twain
The Mississippi River will always have its own way no engineering skill can persuade it to do otherwise.
Mark Twain
The introduction of homeopathy forced the old school doctor to stir around and learn something of a rational nature about his business. You may honestly feel grateful that homeopathy survived the attempts of the allopaths to destroy it.
Mark Twain
Kindness is the language which the deaf can hear and the blind can see.
Mark Twain
The government is merely a servant―merely a temporary servant it cannot be its prerogative to determine what is right and what is wrong, and decide who is a patriot and who isn't. Its function is to obey orders, not originate them.
Mark Twain
Conductor, when you receive a fare, Punch in the presence of the passenjare. A blue trip slip for an eight-cent fare, A buff trip slip for a six-cent fare, A pink trip slip for a three-cent fare, Punch in the presence of the passenjare! Punch, brothers! punch with care! Punch in the presence of the passenjare!
Mark Twain
Public Servant: Persons chosen by the people to distribute the graft.
Mark Twain
We consider that any man who can fiddle all through one of those Virginia Reels without losing his grip may be depended upon in any kind of musical emergency.
Mark Twain
It is better to be a young June-bug than an old bird of paradise.
Mark Twain
The physician who knows only medicine, knows not even medicine.
Mark Twain
We are strange beings, we seem to go free, but we go in chains - chains of training, custom, convention, association, environment - in a word, Circumstance, and against these bonds the strongest of us struggle in vain.
Mark Twain
In the beginning of a change the patriot is a scarce man, and brave, and hated and scorned. When his cause succeeds, the timid join him, for then it costs nothing to be a patriot.
Mark Twain
We recognize that there are no trivial occurrences in life if we get the right focus on them.
Mark Twain
You want to be very careful about lying otherwise you are nearly sure to get caught.
Mark Twain
When you feel like tellin a feller to go to the devil - tell him to go to Chicago - it'll anser every purpose, and is perhaps, a leetle more expensive.
Mark Twain
Education that consists in learning things and not the meaning of them is feeding upon the husks and not the corn
Mark Twain
He was such a good man that people hated to see him coming.
Mark Twain