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No real estate is permanently valuable but the grave.
Mark Twain
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Mark Twain
Age: 74 †
Born: 1835
Born: November 30
Died: 1910
Died: April 21
Aphorist
Author
Autobiographer
Humorist
Journalist
Novelist
Opinion Journalist
Prosaist
Science Fiction Writer
Teacher
Florida
Missouri
Samuel Langhorne Clemens
Samuel L. Clemens
Samuel Clemens
Graves
Permanent
Humorists
Valuable
Permanently
Funny
Tombs
Death
Estate
Real
Estates
Grave
Novelists
More quotes by Mark Twain
Cherimoya, the most delicious fruit known to men.
Mark Twain
Never pick a fight with people who buy ink by the barrel.
Mark Twain
Writing is easy. All you have to do is cross out the wrong words.
Mark Twain
Education: that which reveals to the wise, and conceals from the stupid, the vast limits of their knowledge.
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None but the dead have free speech.
Mark Twain
God, so atrocious in the Old Testament, so attractive in the New--the Jekyl and Hyde of sacred romance.
Mark Twain
As an example to others, and not that I care for moderation myself, it has always been my rule never to smoke when asleep, and never to refrain from smoking when awake.
Mark Twain
Whenever you find yourself on the side of the majority, it is time to pause and reflect.
Mark Twain
He has been a doctor a year now and has had two patients - no, three, I think - yes, it was three I attended their funerals.
Mark Twain
A dozen direct censures are easier to bear than one morganatic compliment.
Mark Twain
Conductor, when you receive a fare, Punch in the presence of the passenjare. A blue trip slip for an eight-cent fare, A buff trip slip for a six-cent fare, A pink trip slip for a three-cent fare, Punch in the presence of the passenjare! Punch, brothers! punch with care! Punch in the presence of the passenjare!
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I knew a man who grabbed a cat by the tail and learned forty percent more about cats than the man who didn't.
Mark Twain
Religion consists in a set of things which the average man thinks he believes and wishes he was certain of.
Mark Twain
Optimist: Person who travels on nothing from nowhere to happiness.
Mark Twain
One mustn't criticize other people on grounds where he can't stand perpendicular himself
Mark Twain
We adore titles and heredities in our hearts and ridicule them with our mouths. This is our democratic privilege.
Mark Twain
Men are easily dealt with--but when you get the women started, you are in for it, you know.
Mark Twain
No amount of evidence will ever persuade an idiot
Mark Twain
Truth is more of a stranger than fiction. When in doubt, tell the truth. If you tell the truth, you don't have to remember anything. Most writers regard the truth as their most valuable possession, and therefore are economical in its use.
Mark Twain
If you take epitaphs seriously, we ought to bury the living and resurrect the dead.
Mark Twain
