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I'm glad I did it, partly because it was worth it, but mostly because I shall never have to do it again.

Mark Twain

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Mark Twain
Age: 74 †
Born: 1835
Born: November 30
Died: 1910
Died: April 21
Aphorist
Author
Autobiographer
Humorist
Journalist
Novelist
Opinion Journalist
Prosaist
Science Fiction Writer
Teacher
Florida
Missouri
Samuel Langhorne Clemens
Samuel L. Clemens
Samuel Clemens
Worth
Shall
Inspirational
Never
Partly
Mostly
Glad
Achievement

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When there was room on the ledge outside of the pots and boxes for a cat, the cat was there- in sunny weather- stretched at full length, asleep and blissful, with her furry belly to the sun and a paw curved over her nose.
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Knowledge becomes wisdom only after it has been put to good use.
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It is not what a man knows, but what he thinks of in time.
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Let us draw the curtain of charity over the rest of this scene
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Never pick a fight with people who buy ink by the barrel.
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I should be sorry to think it was the publishers themselves they got up this entire little flutter to enable them to unload a book that was taking too much room in their cellars, but you can never tell what a publisher will do. I have been one myself.
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in order to make a man or boy covet a thing, it is only necessary to make the thing difficult to attain.
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The more things are forbidden, the more popular they become.
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The rain ...falls upon the just and the unjust alike a thing which would not happen if I were superintending the rain's affairs. No, I would rain softly and sweetly on the just, but if I caught a sample of the unjust outdoors, I would drown him.
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Courage is not the lack of fear. It is acting in spite of it.
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If everyone was satisfied with himself, there would be no heroes.
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Hardly a man in the world has an opinion upon morals, political, or religion which he got otherwise than through his associations and sympathies.
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Benefit of clergy: Half-rate on the railroad.
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The political and commercial morals of the United States are not merely food for laughter, they are an entire banquet.
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I was gratified to be able to answer promptly, and I did. I said I didn't know.
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I could never learn to like her, except on a raft at sea with no other provisions in sight.
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When the end of the world comes, I want to be in Kentucky, because everything there happens 20 years after it happens anywhere else.
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I hope all of us may eventually be together in everlasting peace and bliss -- except the inventor of the # telephone .
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To do something, say something, see something, before anybody else -- these are things that confer a pleasure compared with which other pleasures are tame and commonplace, other ecstasies cheap and trivial.
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The frankest and freest and privatest product of the human mind and heart is a love letter.
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