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I'm glad I did it, partly because it was worth it, but mostly because I shall never have to do it again.
Mark Twain
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Mark Twain
Age: 74 †
Born: 1835
Born: November 30
Died: 1910
Died: April 21
Aphorist
Author
Autobiographer
Humorist
Journalist
Novelist
Opinion Journalist
Prosaist
Science Fiction Writer
Teacher
Florida
Missouri
Samuel Langhorne Clemens
Samuel L. Clemens
Samuel Clemens
Shall
Inspirational
Never
Partly
Mostly
Glad
Achievement
Worth
More quotes by Mark Twain
The North thinks it knows how to make corn bread, but this is a gross superstition. Perhaps no bread in the world is quite as good as Southern corn bread, and perhaps no bread in the world is quite as bad as the Northern imitation of it.
Mark Twain
All human rules are more or less idiotic.
Mark Twain
Man seems to be a rickety poor sort of thing, any way you take him a kind of British Museum of infirmities and inferiorities. He is always undergoing repairs. A machine that was as unreliable as he is would have no market.
Mark Twain
I don't speak German well but several experts have assured me that I write it like an angel. Maybe so, maybe so- I don't know. I've not yet made any acquaintances among the angels. That comes later, whenever it please the Deity. I'm not in any hurry.
Mark Twain
Experience of life (not of books) is the only capital usable in such a book as you have attempted one can make no judicious use of this capital while it is new.
Mark Twain
The choir always tittered and whispered all through the service. There was once a church choir that was not ill-bred, but I have forgotten where it was.
Mark Twain
Talent without work is useless, thank God
Mark Twain
The happy phrasing of a compliment is one of the rarest of human gifts, and the happy delivery of it another.
Mark Twain
The pause - that impressive silence, that eloquent silence, that geometrically progressive silence which often achieves a desired effect where no combination of words, howsoever felicitous, could accomplish it.
Mark Twain
Even popularity can be overdone. In Rome, along at first, you are full of regrets that Michelangelo died but by and by, you only regret that you didn't see him do it.
Mark Twain
There are people who strictly deprive themselves of each and every eatable, drinkable, and smokable which has in any way acquired a shady reputation. They pay this price for health. And health is all they get for it. How strange it is. It is like paying out your whole fortune for a cow that has gone dry.
Mark Twain
Learning softeneth the heart and breedeth gentleness and charity.
Mark Twain
All say, ‘how hard it is that we have to die’ -- a strange complaint to come from the mouths of those who have had to live.
Mark Twain
We are all beggars, each in his own way.
Mark Twain
Education: that which reveals to the wise, and conceals from the stupid, the vast limits of their knowledge.
Mark Twain
At 50, a man can be an ass without being an optimist but not an optimist without being an ass
Mark Twain
That's the difference between governments and individuals. Governments don't care, individuals do.
Mark Twain
I persuaded him to throw the dirk away and it was as easy as persuading a child to give up some bright fresh new way of killing itself.
Mark Twain
Low comedies are written for the drawing-room, the kitchen and the stable, and if you cut out the kitchen and the stable the drawing-room can't support the play by itself.
Mark Twain
How slow and still the time did drag along.
Mark Twain
