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Let us draw the curtain of charity over the rest of this scene

Mark Twain

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Mark Twain
Age: 74 †
Born: 1835
Born: November 30
Died: 1910
Died: April 21
Aphorist
Author
Autobiographer
Humorist
Journalist
Novelist
Opinion Journalist
Prosaist
Science Fiction Writer
Teacher
Florida
Missouri
Samuel Langhorne Clemens
Samuel L. Clemens
Samuel Clemens
Curtain
Curtains
Draw
Charity
Draws
Scene
Rest

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A group of men in evening clothes looks like a flock of crows, and is just about as inspiring.
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In my age, as in my youth, night brings me many a deep remorse. I realize that from the cradle up I have been like the rest of the race - never quite sane in the night.
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There is no God, no universe, no human race, no earthly life, no heaven, no hell. It is all a dream, a grotesque and foolish dream. Nothing exists but you. And you are but a thought -a vagrant thought, a useless thought, a homeless thought, wandering forlorn among the empty eternities!
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Obscurity and a competence—that is the life that is best worth living.
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There's always a hole in theories somewhere if you look close enough.
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When we remember we are all mad, the mysteries disappear and life stands explained.
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[I] shall never use profanity except in discussing house rent and taxes. Indeed, upon second thought, I will not use it then, for it is unchristian, inelegant, and degrading--though to speak truly I do not see how house rent and taxes are going to be discussed worth a cent without it.
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When a person is accustomed to one hundred and thirty-eight in the shade, his ideas about cold weather are not valuable.
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There warn't anybody at the church, except maybe a hog or two, for there warn't any lock on the door, and hogs likes a puncheon floor in summer-time because it's cool. If you notice, most folks don't go to church only when they've got to but a hog is different.
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Worrying is paying interest on a debt you might not even owe.
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Every time I read a Jane Austen novel, I feel like a bartender at the gates of heaven.
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It was on the 10th day of May - 1884 - that I confessed to age by mounting spectacles for the first time, and in the same hour I renewed my youth, to outward appearance, by mounting a bicycle for the first time. The spectacles stayed on.
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We have the best government that money can buy.
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My land, the power of training! Of influence! Of education! It can bring a body up to believe anything.
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Do your duty today and repent tomorrow.
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Don't look at the world with your hands in your pockets. To write about it you have to reach out and touch it.
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