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If you don't like the weather in New England now, just wait a few minutes.

Mark Twain

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Mark Twain
Age: 74 †
Born: 1835
Born: November 30
Died: 1910
Died: April 21
Aphorist
Author
Autobiographer
Humorist
Journalist
Novelist
Opinion Journalist
Prosaist
Science Fiction Writer
Teacher
Florida
Missouri
Samuel Langhorne Clemens
Samuel L. Clemens
Samuel Clemens
Weather
Wait
England
Minutes
Waiting
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More quotes by Mark Twain

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when we badly want a thing, we go to hunting for good and righteous reasons for it we give it that fine name to comfort our consciences, whereas we privately know we are only hunting for plausible ones.
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Forget and forgive. This is not difficult when properly understood.
Mark Twain
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If the bubble reputation can be obtained only at the cannon's mouth, I am willing to go there for it, provided the cannon is empty.
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If you tell the truth you do not need a good memory!
Mark Twain
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It is easier for a cannibal to enter the Kingdom of Heaven through the eye of a rich man's needle that it is for any other foreigner to read the terrible German script.
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A railroad is like a lie you have to keep building it to make it stand.
Mark Twain
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It is better to support schools than jails.
Mark Twain
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His money is twice tainted: taint yours and taint mine.
Mark Twain
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The conviction of the rich that the poor are happier is no more foolish than the conviction of the poor that the rich are.
Mark Twain
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A circle is a round straight line with a hole in the middle.
Mark Twain
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What do you think of the human mind? I mean, in case you think there is a human mind.
Mark Twain
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You can never find a Christian who has acquired this valuable knowledge, this saving knowledge, by any process but the everlasting and all-sufficient 'people say.'
Mark Twain
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There is nothing in the world like persuasive speech to fuddle the mental apparatus.
Mark Twain
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As for the dinosaur - But Noah's conscience was easy it was not named in his cargo list and he and the boys were not aware that there was such a creature. He said he could not blame himself for not knowing about the dinosaur, because it was an American animal and America had not then been discovered.
Mark Twain
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Wherefore being all of one mind, we do highly resolve that government of the grafted by the grafter for the grafter shall not perish from the earth.
Mark Twain
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Too much of anything is bad, but too much good whiskey is barely enough.
Mark Twain
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The lie, as a virtue, a principle, is eternal the lie, as a recreation, a solace, a refuge in time of need, the fourth Grace, the tenth Muse, man's best and surest friend is immortal
Mark Twain
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The secret of getting ahead is getting started. The secret of getting started is breaking your complex overwhelming tasks into small manageable tasks, and starting on the first one.
Mark Twain
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The reason most people don't go to church is because they've already been.
Mark Twain
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We all belong to the nasty stinking little human race, & of course it is not nice for God's beloved vermin to scoff at each other... Oh, we are a nasty little lot-& to think there are people who would like to save us & continue us. It won't happen if I have any influence.
Mark Twain