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It is a mistake that there is no bath that will cure people's manners, but drowning would help.
Mark Twain
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Mark Twain
Age: 74 †
Born: 1835
Born: November 30
Died: 1910
Died: April 21
Aphorist
Author
Autobiographer
Humorist
Journalist
Novelist
Opinion Journalist
Prosaist
Science Fiction Writer
Teacher
Florida
Missouri
Samuel Langhorne Clemens
Samuel L. Clemens
Samuel Clemens
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Drowning
More quotes by Mark Twain
Indecency, vulgarity, obscenity - these are strictly confined to man he invented them. Among the higher animals there is no trace of them. They hide nothing. They are not ashamed.
Mark Twain
The less there is to justify a traditional custom, the harder it is to get rid of it
Mark Twain
When the end of the world comes, I want to be in Kentucky, because everything there happens 20 years after it happens anywhere else.
Mark Twain
Out of the depths of my happy heart wells a great tide of love and prayer for this priceless treasure that is confided to my lifelong keeping. You cannot see its waves as they flow toward you, darling, but in these lines you will hear...the distant beating of its surf.
Mark Twain
Italy is the home of art and swindling home of religion and moral rottenness
Mark Twain
He was a solemn, unsmiling, sanctimonious old iceberg who looked like he was waiting for a vacancy in the Trinity.
Mark Twain
An occultation of Venus is not half so difficult as an eclipse of the sun, but because it comes seldom the world thinks it's a grand thing.
Mark Twain
Each nation knowing it has the only true religion and the only sane system of government, each despising all the others, each an ass and not suspecting it.
Mark Twain
God made the Idiot for practice, and then He made the School Board.
Mark Twain
There is no such thing as the Queen's English. The property has gone into the hands of a joint stock company and we own the bulk of the shares!
Mark Twain
Thanksgiving day. Let us all give humble, hearty, and sincere thanks now, but the turkeys.
Mark Twain
Man seems to be a rickety poor sort of thing, any way you take him a kind of British Museum of infirmities and inferiorities. He is always undergoing repairs. A machine that was as unreliable as he is would have no market.
Mark Twain
It is best to read the weather forecast before praying for rain.
Mark Twain
Censorship is telling a man he can't have a steak just because a baby can't chew it.
Mark Twain
Synergy - the bonus that is achieved when things work together harmoniously.
Mark Twain
You may say organize, organize, organize but there may be so much organization that it will interfere with the work to be done.
Mark Twain
Anyone who can only think of one way to spell a word obviously lacks imagination.
Mark Twain
The truth is a precious commodity. That's why I use it so sparingly.
Mark Twain
To refuse awards is another way of accepting them with more noise than is normal.
Mark Twain
It is easy to find fault, if one has that disposition. There was once a man who, not being able to find any other fault with his coal, complained that there were too many prehistoric toads in it.
Mark Twain
