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I would like to live in Manchester, England. The transition between Manchester and death would be unnoticeable.

Mark Twain

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Mark Twain
Age: 74 †
Born: 1835
Born: November 30
Died: 1910
Died: April 21
Aphorist
Author
Autobiographer
Humorist
Journalist
Novelist
Opinion Journalist
Prosaist
Science Fiction Writer
Teacher
Florida
Missouri
Samuel Langhorne Clemens
Samuel L. Clemens
Samuel Clemens
Sarcastic
Transition
England
Death
Live
Would
Manchester
Like
Amusing
Sarcasm

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There was never yet an uninteresting life. Such a thing is an impossibility. Inside of the dullest exterior there is a drama, a comedy, and a tragedy.
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Life becomes fully understandable only the moment we realise that we are all mad.
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Annihilation has no terrors for me, because I have already tried it before I was born --a hundred million years --and I have suffered more in an hour, in this life, than I remember to have suffered in the whole hundred million years put together.
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Too bad that youth is wasted on the young.
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My mother had a great deal of trouble with me, but I think she enjoyed it.
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If you're looking for friends when you need them...it's too late.
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Do not undervalue the headache. While it is at its sharpest it seems a bad investment but when relief begins, the unexpired remainder is worth $4 a minute.
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A jay hasnt got any more principle than a Congressman. A jay will lie, a jay will steal, a jay will deceive, a jay will betray and four times out of five, a jay will go back on his solemnest promise.
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Life would be infinitely happier if we could only be born at the age of eighty and gradually approach eighteen.
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[I] shall never use profanity except in discussing house rent and taxes. Indeed, upon second thought, I will not use it then, for it is unchristian, inelegant, and degrading--though to speak truly I do not see how house rent and taxes are going to be discussed worth a cent without it.
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I heard a Californian student in Heidelberg say, in one of his calmest moods, that he would rather decline two drinks than one German adjective.
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If the desire to kill and the opportunity to kill came always together, who would escape hanging?
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The miracle or the power that elevates the few is to be found in their industry, application and perseverance under the promptings of a brave, determined spirit.
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Anyone who can only think of one way to spell a word obviously lacks imagination.
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Inherited ideas are a curious thing, and interesting to observe and examine.
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The older we grow the greater becomes our wonder at how much ignorance one can contain without bursting one's clothes.
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Never tell the truth to people who are not worthy of it.
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The physician who knows only medicine, knows not even medicine.
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It is not worth while to try to keep history from repeating itself, for man's character will always make the preventing of the repetitions impossible.
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Shut the door not that it lets in the cold but that it lets out the coziness.
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