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High and fine literature is wine, and mine is only water but everybody likes water.

Mark Twain

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Mark Twain
Age: 74 †
Born: 1835
Born: November 30
Died: 1910
Died: April 21
Aphorist
Author
Autobiographer
Humorist
Journalist
Novelist
Opinion Journalist
Prosaist
Science Fiction Writer
Teacher
Florida
Missouri
Samuel Langhorne Clemens
Samuel L. Clemens
Samuel Clemens
Everybody
High
Literature
Water
Likes
Wine
Mines
Mine
Fine

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All human rules are more or less idiotic.
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The humorous writer professes to awaken and direct your love, your pity, your kindness--your scorn for untruth, pretension, imposture....He takes upon himself to be the week-day preacher.
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Never pick a fight with people who buy ink by the barrel.
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America cannot have an empire abroad and a Republic at home.
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A monarch, when good, is entitled to the consideration which we accord to a pirate who keeps Sunday School between crimes when bad, he is entitled to none at all.
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A woman springs a sudden reproach upon you which provokes a hot retort, and then she will presently ask you to apologize.
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The history of our race, and each individual’s experience, are sown thick with evidence that a truth is not hard to kill and that a lie told well is immortal.
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It usually takes more than three weeks to prepare a good impromptu speech. Overnight success is a fallacy. It is preceded by a great deal of preparation. Ask any successful person how they came to this point in their lives, and they will have a story to tell.
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Frankenstein took some flesh and bones and blood and made a man out of them the man ran away and fell to raping and robbing and murdering everywhere, and Frankenstein was horrified and in despair, and said, I made him, without asking his consent, and it makes me responsible for every crime he commits. I am the criminal, he is innocent.
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Nothing incites to money-crimes like great poverty or great wealth.
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Do not undervalue the headache. While it is at its sharpest it seems a bad investment but when relief begins, the unexpired remainder is worth $4 a minute.
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Ignorance, intolerance, egotism, self-assertion, opaque perception, dense and pitiful chuckle headedness - and an almost pathetic unconsciousness of it all, that is what I was at nineteen and twenty.
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There was never yet an uninteresting life. Such a thing is an impossibility. Inside of the dullest exterior there is a drama, a comedy, and a tragedy.
Mark Twain
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The report of my death was an exaggeration.
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Never tell the truth to people who are not worthy of it.
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The ability to find solutions to life's challenges is what makes us grow as a person.
Mark Twain
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In writing, I shall always confine myself strictly to the truth, except when it is attended with inconvenience.
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Work consists of whatever a body is obliged to do. Play consists of whatever a body is not obliged to do.
Mark Twain
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One may make their house a palace of sham, or they can make it a home, a refuge.
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Imagine, if you will, that I am an idiot. Then, imagine that I am also a Congressman. But, alas, I repeat myself.
Mark Twain