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High and fine literature is wine, and mine is only water but everybody likes water.

Mark Twain

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Mark Twain
Age: 74 †
Born: 1835
Born: November 30
Died: 1910
Died: April 21
Aphorist
Author
Autobiographer
Humorist
Journalist
Novelist
Opinion Journalist
Prosaist
Science Fiction Writer
Teacher
Florida
Missouri
Samuel Langhorne Clemens
Samuel L. Clemens
Samuel Clemens
Literature
Water
Likes
Wine
Mines
Mine
Fine
Everybody
High

More quotes by Mark Twain

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When you ascend the hill of prosperity, may you not meet a friend.
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If God is what people say there can be no one in the universe so unhappy as He for He sees unceasingly myriads of His creatures suffering unspeakable miseries--and besides this foresees how they are going to suffer during the remainder of their lives. One might as well say, As unhappy as God.
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Humor, to be comprehensible to anybody, must be built upon a foundation with which he is familiar. If he can't see the foundation the superstructure is to him merely a freak -- like the Flatiron building without any visible means of support -- something that ought to be arrested.
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I admire him, I frankly confess it and when his time is come I shall buy a piece of the rope for a keepsake.
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Methuselah lived to be 969 years old . You boys and girls will see more in the next fifty years than Methuselah saw in his whole lifetime.
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There are no accidents, all things have a deep and calculated purpose sometimes the methods employed by Providence seem strange and incongruous, but we have only to be patient and wait for the result: then we recognize that no others would have answered the purpose, and we are rebuked and humbled.
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If you hold a cat by the tail you learn things you cannot learn any other way.
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When one has tasted watermelon he knows what the angels eat.
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They all laid their heads together like as many lawyers when they are gettin' ready to prove that a man's heirs ain't got any right to his property.
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No real estate is permanently valuable but the grave.
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I am always reading immoral books on the sly, and then selfishly trying to prevent other people from having the same wicked good time.
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In the South the war is what A.D. is elsewhere they date from it.
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A clean desk is a sign of a cluttered desk drawer.
Mark Twain
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Good friends, good books and a sleepy conscience: this is the ideal life.
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Pity is for the living, envy is for the dead. Death, the refuge, the solace, the best and kindliest and most prized friend and benefactor of the erring, the forsaken, the old and weary and broken of heart.
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Life becomes fully understandable only the moment we realise that we are all mad.
Mark Twain
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Gratitude and treachery are merely the two extremities of the same procession. You have seen all of it that is worth staying for when the band and the gaudy officials have gone by.
Mark Twain
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Additional problems are the offspring of poor solutions.
Mark Twain
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Nothing exists but you. And you are but a thought.
Mark Twain
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There is this trouble about special providences namely, there is so often a doubt as to which party was intended to be the beneficiary. In the case of the children, the bears, and the prophet, the bears got more real satisfaction out of the episode than the prophet did, because they got the children.
Mark Twain