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The humorous story is told gravely the teller does his best to conceal the fact that he even dimly suspects that there is anything funny about it.
Mark Twain
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Mark Twain
Age: 74 †
Born: 1835
Born: November 30
Died: 1910
Died: April 21
Aphorist
Author
Autobiographer
Humorist
Journalist
Novelist
Opinion Journalist
Prosaist
Science Fiction Writer
Teacher
Florida
Missouri
Samuel Langhorne Clemens
Samuel L. Clemens
Samuel Clemens
Stories
Crafts
Doe
Humorous
Anything
Humor
Best
Told
Gravely
Even
Story
Dimly
Fact
Teller
Funny
Conceal
Facts
Suspects
More quotes by Mark Twain
What a wee little part of a person's life are his acts and his words! His real life is led in his head, and is known to none but himself.
Mark Twain
Delicacy - a sad, sad false delicacy - robs literature of the two best things among its belongings: Family-circle narratives & obscene stories.
Mark Twain
I cannot call to mind a single instance where I have ever been irreverent, except toward the things which were sacred to other people.
Mark Twain
We consider that any man who can fiddle all through one of those Virginia Reels without losing his grip may be depended upon in any kind of musical emergency.
Mark Twain
If I were going to construct a God I would furnish him with some ways and qualities and characteristics which the Present One lacks... He would spend some of His eternities in trying to forgive Himself for making man unhappy when He could have made him happy with the same effort and He would spend the rest of them in studying astronomy.
Mark Twain
Temperate temperance is best intemperate temperance injures the cause of temperance.
Mark Twain
To forget pain is to be painless to forget care is to be rid of it to go abroad is to accomplish both.
Mark Twain
I can teach anybody how to get what they want out of life. The problem is that I can't find anybody who can tell me what they want.
Mark Twain
There are two times in a man's life when he should not speculate: when he can't afford it, and when he can.
Mark Twain
If Christ were here now there is one thing he would not be — a Christian.
Mark Twain
He was endowed with a stupidity which by the least little stretch would go around the globe four times and tie.
Mark Twain
Good decisions come from experience. Experience comes from making bad decisions.
Mark Twain
The secret of success is making your vocation your vacation.
Mark Twain
The humorous story is American, the comic story is English, the witty story is French. The humorous story depends for its effect upon the manner of the tellingthe comic and the witty story upon the matter.
Mark Twain
I said there was but one solitary thing about the past worth remembering, and that was the fact that it is past-can't be restored.
Mark Twain
The truth hurts, but silence kills.
Mark Twain
Is a person's public and private opinion the same? It is thought there have been instances.
Mark Twain
At 50, a man can be an ass without being an optimist but not an optimist without being an ass
Mark Twain
Only he who has seen better days and lives to see better days again knows their full value.
Mark Twain
Lord save us all from a hope tree that has lost the faculty of putting out blossoms.
Mark Twain
