Quote

Explaining humor is a lot like dissecting a frog, you learn a lot in the process, but in the end you kill it.

Mark Twain

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Mark Twain
Age: 74 †
Born: 1835
Born: November 30
Died: 1910
Died: April 21
Aphorist
Author
Autobiographer
Humorist
Journalist
Novelist
Opinion Journalist
Prosaist
Science Fiction Writer
Teacher
Florida
Missouri
Samuel Langhorne Clemens
Samuel L. Clemens
Samuel Clemens
Humor
Learn
Process
Ends
Dissecting
Like
Frog
Frogs
Explaining
Kill

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Write without pay until somebody offers to pay.
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Cauliflower is nothing but cabbage with a college education.
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A dozen direct censures are easier to bear than one morganatic compliment.
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Where every man in a state has a vote, brutal laws are impossible.
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We have the best government that money can buy.
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Every time you stop a school, you will have to build a jail.
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Words are only painted fire, a look is the fire itself. She gave that look, and carried it away to the treasury of heaven, where all things that are divine belong.
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If the world comes to an end, I want to be in Cincinnati. Everything comes there ten years later.
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There is no urge so great as for one man to edit another man's work.
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I would rather have my ignorance than another man's knowledge, because I have so much of it.
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...Man is a marvelous curiosity. When he is at his very very best he is a sort of low grade nickel-plated angel at his worst he is unspeakable, unimaginable and first and last and all the time he is a sarcasm. Yet he blandly and in all sincerity calls himself the 'noblest work of God.'
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The proverb says, Born lucky, always lucky, and I am very superstitious. As a small boy I was notoriously lucky. It was usual for one or two of our lads (per annum) to get drowned in the Mississippi or in Bear Creek, but I was pulled out in a 2/3 drowned condition 9 times before I learned to swim, and was considered to be a cat in disguise.
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Every year you wait, long ago gets farther away.
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The proper office of a friend is to side with you when you are in the wrong. Nearly anybody will side with you when you are in the right.
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There ain't anything that is so interesting to look at as a place that a book has talked about.
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He was endowed with a stupidity which by the least little stretch would go around the globe four times and tie.
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The report of my death was an exaggeration.
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The time to begin writing an article is when you have finished it to your satisfaction. By that time you begin to clearly and logically perceive what it is you really want to say.
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There is a sumptuous variety about the New England weather... In the spring I have counted one hundred and twenty-six different kinds of weather inside of four and twenty hours.
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If the bubble reputation can be obtained only at the cannon's mouth, I am willing to go there for it, provided the cannon is empty.
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