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I like Joan of Arc best of all my books and it is the best I know it perfectly well.

Mark Twain

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Mark Twain
Age: 74 †
Born: 1835
Born: November 30
Died: 1910
Died: April 21
Aphorist
Author
Autobiographer
Humorist
Journalist
Novelist
Opinion Journalist
Prosaist
Science Fiction Writer
Teacher
Florida
Missouri
Samuel Langhorne Clemens
Samuel L. Clemens
Samuel Clemens
Well
Like
Joan
Arcs
Perfectly
Books
Best
Wells
Book

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These are the true and only God, mighty and supreme.
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There ain't no way to find out why a snorer can't hear himself snore.
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I couldn't bear to think about it and yet, somehow, I couldn't think about nothing else.
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I don't know anything about this man. Anyhow, I only know two things about him. One is, he has never been in jail, and the other is, I don't know why.
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Is the human race a joke? Was it devised and patched together in a dull time when there was nothing important to do?
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And so when I couldn't stand it no longer, I lit out. I got into my old rags and my sugar-hogshead again, and was free and satisfied.
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Hain't we got all the fools in town on our side? And hain't that a big enough majority in any town?
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He [George Washington Cable] has taught me to abhor and detest the Sabbath day and hunt up new and troublesome ways to dishonor it.
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When a man arrives at great prosperity God did it: when he falls into disaster he did it himself.
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from the beginning of my sojourn in this world there was a persistent vacancy in me where the industry ought to be. (Ought to was is better, perhaps, though the most of the authorities differ as to this.
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Everyone is a moon, and has a dark side which he never shows to anybody.
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To be a patriot, one had to say, and keep on saying, Our Country, right or wrong, and urge on the little war. Have you not perceived that that phrase is an insult to the nation?
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Humor is man's greatest blessing.
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I should be sorry to think it was the publishers themselves they got up this entire little flutter to enable them to unload a book that was taking too much room in their cellars, but you can never tell what a publisher will do. I have been one myself.
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Be good and you'll be lonesome
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Talent without work is useless, thank God
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Every time you stop a school, you will have to build a jail.
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When we remember we are all mad, the mysteries disappear and life stands explained.
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Give a man a reputation as an early riser and he can sleep 'til noon.
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In my schoolboy days I had no aversion to slavery. I was not aware there was anything wrong about it. No-one arraigned it in my hearing the local papers said nothing against it the local pulpit taught us that God approved it, that it was a holy thing, and that the doubter need only look in the Bible if he wished to settle his mind.
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