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I couldn't bear to think about it and yet, somehow, I couldn't think about nothing else.

Mark Twain

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Mark Twain
Age: 74 †
Born: 1835
Born: November 30
Died: 1910
Died: April 21
Aphorist
Author
Autobiographer
Humorist
Journalist
Novelist
Opinion Journalist
Prosaist
Science Fiction Writer
Teacher
Florida
Missouri
Samuel Langhorne Clemens
Samuel L. Clemens
Samuel Clemens
Bears
Couldn
Else
Nothing
Think
Thinking
Somehow
Bear

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A dozen direct censures are easier to bear than one morganatic compliment.
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If one is honest there is no need to remember.
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There are too many stars in some places and not enough in others.
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When someone dies, it is like when your house burns down it isn't for years that you realize the full extent of your loss.
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Don't just sit there and worry. Be proactive. Do something - anything - about what's worrying you so you can gain information, focus and control over the situation. I've suffered a great many catastrophes in my life. Most of them never happened.
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The first time a student realizes that a little learning is a dangerous thing is when he brings home a poor report card.
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A man's character may be learned from the adjectives which he habitually uses in conversation.
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Clothes make the man. Naked people have little or no influence on society.
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There is only one good sex. The female one.
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A conspiracy is nothing but a secret agreement of a number of men for the pursuance of policies which they dare not admit in public
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Don't look at the world with your hands in your pockets. To write about it you have to reach out and touch it.
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The Bible is a wonderful book you can prove anything you want with it.
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The worst loneliness is not to be comfortable with yourself.
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When angry, count to four when very angry, swear.
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Familiarity breeds contempt. How accurate that is. The reason we hold truth in such respect is because we have so little opportunity to get familiar with it.
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Be respectful to your superiors, if you have any.
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The proper office of a friend is to side with you when you are in the wrong. Nearly anybody will side with you when you are in the right.
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Golden rule: Made of hard metal so it could stand severe wear, it not being known at that time that butter would answer.
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The introduction of homeopathy forced the old school doctor to stir around and learn something of a rational nature about his business. You may honestly feel grateful that homeopathy survived the attempts of the allopaths to destroy it.
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The fact is, the king was a good deal more than a king, he was a man and when a man is a man, you can't knock it out of him.
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