Quote

I came in with Halley's Comet in 1835. It is coming again next year, and I expect to go out with it. It will be the greatest disappointment of my life if I don't go out with Halley's Comet. The Almighty has said, no doubt: Now here are these two unaccountable freaks they came in together, they must go out together.

Mark Twain

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Mark Twain
Age: 74 †
Born: 1835
Born: November 30
Died: 1910
Died: April 21
Aphorist
Author
Autobiographer
Humorist
Journalist
Novelist
Opinion Journalist
Prosaist
Science Fiction Writer
Teacher
Florida
Missouri
Samuel Langhorne Clemens
Samuel L. Clemens
Samuel Clemens
Year
Almighty
Next
Freak
Two
Disappointment
Together
Expect
Halley
Must
Coming
Unaccountable
Years
Greatest
Comet
Life
Doubt
Comets
Came
Freaks

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Among other common lies, we have the silent lie - the deception which one conveys by simply keeping still and concealing the truth. Many obstinate truth-mongers indulge in this dissipation, imagining that if they speak no lie, they lie not at all.
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Tom appeared on the sidewalk with a bucket of whitewash and a long-handled brush. He surveyed the fence, and all gladness left him and a deep melancholy settled down upon his spirit. Thirty yards of board fence nine feet high. Life to him seemed hollow, and existence but a burden.
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the more I know about people, the better I like my dogs.
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There is a charm about the forbidden that makes it unspeakably desirable.
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Never be haughty to the humble, never be humble to the haughty.
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A joke, even if it be a lame one, is nowhere so keenly relished or quickly applauded as in a murder trial.
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There is only one good sex. The female one.
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Wit and Humor - if any difference, it is in duration - lightning and electric light. Same material, apparently but one is vivid, and can do damage - the other fools along and enjoys elaboration.
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To place man properly at the present time, he stands somewhere between the angels and the French.
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Broad, wholesome, charitable views .. can not be acquired by vegetating in one's little corner of the earth.
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The average American's simplest and commonest form of breakfast consists of coffee and beefsteak.
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The master minds of all nations, in all ages, have sprung in affluent multitude from the mass of the nations, and from the mass of the nation only-not from its privileged classes.
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Man seems to be a rickety poor sort of thing, any way you take him a kind of British Museum of infirmities and inferiorities. He is always undergoing repairs. A machine that was as unreliable as he is would have no market.
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Go to bed early, get up early-this is wise.
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Tis Better to Sit there and LOOK the fool, than to open your mouth and prove it.
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I was exceedingly delighted with the waltz, and also with the polka. These differ in name, but there the difference ceases
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Men are like bank accounts. The more money, the more interest they generate.
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All our acts, reasoned and unreasoned, are selfish
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Love seems the swiftest, but it is the slowest of growths
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What is the most rigorous law of our being? Growth.
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