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Fame is a vapor, popularity an accident the only earthly certainty is oblivion.

Mark Twain

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Mark Twain
Age: 74 †
Born: 1835
Born: November 30
Died: 1910
Died: April 21
Aphorist
Author
Autobiographer
Humorist
Journalist
Novelist
Opinion Journalist
Prosaist
Science Fiction Writer
Teacher
Florida
Missouri
Samuel Langhorne Clemens
Samuel L. Clemens
Samuel Clemens
Popularity
Accident
Accidents
Certainty
Reputation
Fame
Vapor
Inspiration
Earthly
Oblivion

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The man who is ostentatious of his modesty is twin to the statue that wears a fig-leaf.
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The law is a system that protects everybody who can afford to hire a good lawyer.
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What is Man? Man is a noisome bacillus whom Our Heavenly Father created because he was disappointed in the monkey.
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It may have happened, it may not have happened but it could have happened.
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Nature knows no indecencies man invents them.
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Wherefore being all of one mind, we do highly resolve that government of the grafted by the grafter for the grafter shall not perish from the earth.
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Ethical man: A Christian holding four aces.
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You thunder and lightning too much the reader ceases to get under the bed, by and by.
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Be respectful to your superiors, if you have any.
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There are things which some people never attempt during their whole lives, but one of these is not poetry. Poetry attacks all human beings sooner or later, and, like the measles, is mild or violent according to the age of the sufferer.
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Total abstinence is so excellent a thing that it cannot be carried to too great an extent. In my passion for it I even carry it so far as to totally abstain from total abstinence itself.
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Marriage -- yes, it is the supreme felicity of life. I concede it. And it is also the supreme tragedy of life. The deeper the love the surer the tragedy. And the more disconsolating when it comes.
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Once I talked to the inmates of an insane asylum in Hartford. I have talked to idiots a thousand times, but only once to the insane.
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Often a quite assified remark becomes sanctified by use and petrified by custom it is then a permanency, its term of activity a geologic period.
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A man is never more truthful than when he acknowledges himself a liar.
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One thing at a time, is my motto - and just play that thing for all it is worth, even if it's only tto pair and a jack.
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A person who won't read has no advantage over one who can't read.
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There is nothing more awe-inspiring than a miracle except the credulity that can take it at par.
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It's so damned humiliating.
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If you hold a cat by the tail you learn things you cannot learn any other way.
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