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A gentleman is someone who knows how to play the banjo and doesn't.

Mark Twain

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Mark Twain
Age: 74 †
Born: 1835
Born: November 30
Died: 1910
Died: April 21
Aphorist
Author
Autobiographer
Humorist
Journalist
Novelist
Opinion Journalist
Prosaist
Science Fiction Writer
Teacher
Florida
Missouri
Samuel Langhorne Clemens
Samuel L. Clemens
Samuel Clemens
Doesn
Someone
Music
Play
Banjo
Banjos
Gentleman

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The holy passion of Friendship is of so sweet and steady and loyal and enduring a nature that it will last through a whole lifetime, if not asked to lend money.
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Every man has a secret ambition: To outsmart horses, fish and women.
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The more things are forbidden, the more popular they become.
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The difference between fiction and nonfiction is that fiction must be absolutely believable.
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More than once I have been humiliated by my resemblance to God the father He is always longing for the love of His children and trying to get it on the cheapest and laziest terms He can invent.
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Those who say truth is stranger than fiction have wasted their time on poorly written fiction.
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Love seems the swiftest, but it is the slowest of growths
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He was a solemn, unsmiling, sanctimonious old iceberg who looked like he was waiting for a vacancy in the Trinity.
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When one has tasted watermelon he knows what the angels eat.
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I saw men whom thirty years had changed but slightly but their wives had grown old. These were good women it is very wearing to be good.
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Not until you become a stranger to yourself will you be able to make acquaintance with the Friend.
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The humorous story is told gravely the teller does his best to conceal the fact that he even dimly suspects that there is anything funny about it.
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The less there is to justify a traditional custom, the harder it is to get rid of it
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