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God created war so that Americans would learn geography.
Mark Twain
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Mark Twain
Age: 74 †
Born: 1835
Born: November 30
Died: 1910
Died: April 21
Aphorist
Author
Autobiographer
Humorist
Journalist
Novelist
Opinion Journalist
Prosaist
Science Fiction Writer
Teacher
Florida
Missouri
Samuel Langhorne Clemens
Samuel L. Clemens
Samuel Clemens
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America
Americans
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Geography
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Learning
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Learn
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War
God
More quotes by Mark Twain
Anger is an acid that can do more harm to the vessel in which it is stored than to anything on which it is poured.
Mark Twain
There is no character, howsoever good and fine, but it can be destroyed by ridicule, howsoever poor and witless.
Mark Twain
There is nothing training cannot do. Nothing is above its reach. It can turn bad morals to good it can destroy bad principles and recreate good ones it can lift men to angelship.
Mark Twain
Love is madness, if thwarted it develops fast.
Mark Twain
None but the dead have free speech.
Mark Twain
Where every man in a state has a vote, brutal laws are impossible.
Mark Twain
It is better to support schools than jails.
Mark Twain
I have learned that human existence is essentially tragic. It is only the love of God, disclosed and enacted in Christ, that redeems the human tragedy and makes it tolerable. No, more than tolerable. Wonderful.
Mark Twain
The dreamer's valuation of a thing lost - not another man's - is the only standard to measure it by, and his grief for it makes it large and great and fine, and is worthy of our reverence in all cases.
Mark Twain
We Americans worship the almighty dollar! Well, it is a worthier god than Heredity Privilege.
Mark Twain
I will remark in the way of general information, that in California, that land of felicitous nomenclature, the literary name of this sort of stuff is hogwash
Mark Twain
There ought to be a room in every house to swear in. It's dangerous to have to repress an emotion like that.
Mark Twain
Every generalization is dangerous, especially this one.
Mark Twain
There are too many stars in some places and not enough in others.
Mark Twain
I don't mind what the opposition say of me so long as they don't tell the truth about me. But when they descend to telling the truth about me I consider that this is taking an unfair advantage.
Mark Twain
The cat, having sat upon a hot stove lid, will not sit upon a hot stove lid again. Nor upon a cold stove lid.
Mark Twain
One frequently only finds out how really beautiful a beautiful woman is after considerable acquaintance with her.
Mark Twain
The time to begin writing an article is when you have finished it to your satisfaction. By that time you begin to clearly and logically perceive what it is you really want to say.
Mark Twain
A classic is something that everybody wants to have read and nobody wants to read.
Mark Twain
What is Man? Man is a noisome bacillus whom Our Heavenly Father created because he was disappointed in the monkey.
Mark Twain
