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God created war so that Americans would learn geography.
Mark Twain
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Mark Twain
Age: 74 †
Born: 1835
Born: November 30
Died: 1910
Died: April 21
Aphorist
Author
Autobiographer
Humorist
Journalist
Novelist
Opinion Journalist
Prosaist
Science Fiction Writer
Teacher
Florida
Missouri
Samuel Langhorne Clemens
Samuel L. Clemens
Samuel Clemens
Inspirational
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America
Americans
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Geography
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Learn
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War
God
More quotes by Mark Twain
The two Testaments are interesting, each in its own way. The Old one gives us a picture of these people's Deity as he was before he got religion, the other one gives us a picture of him as he appeared afterward.
Mark Twain
I can teach anybody how to get what they want out of life. The problem is that I can't find anybody who can tell me what they want.
Mark Twain
The best way to cheer yourself up is to try to cheer somebody else up.
Mark Twain
You may say organize, organize, organize but there may be so much organization that it will interfere with the work to be done.
Mark Twain
I have never examined the subject of humor until now. I am surprised to find how much ground it covers. I have got its divisions and frontiers down on a piece of paper. I find it defined as a production of the brain, as the power of the brain to produce something humorous, and the capacity of percieving humor.
Mark Twain
I don't speak German well but several experts have assured me that I write it like an angel. Maybe so, maybe so- I don't know. I've not yet made any acquaintances among the angels. That comes later, whenever it please the Deity. I'm not in any hurry.
Mark Twain
Children are natural mimics who act like their parents despite every effort to teach them good manners.
Mark Twain
Do right and you will be conspicuous.
Mark Twain
There ain't anything that is so interesting to look at as a place that a book has talked about.
Mark Twain
Hunger is the handmaid of genius
Mark Twain
It has been said that a Scotchman has not seen the world until he has seen Edinburgh and I think that I may say that an American has not seen the United States until he has seen Mardi Gras in New Orleans.
Mark Twain
No child should be permitted to grow up without exercise for imagination. It enriches life for him. It makes things wonderful and beautiful.
Mark Twain
Be good and you will be lonely.
Mark Twain
Are you so unobservant as not to have found out that sanity and happiness are an impossible combination?
Mark Twain
Biographies are but the clothes and buttons of the man. The biography of the man himself cannot be written.
Mark Twain
When an audience does not complain, it is a compliment, and when it does, it is a compliment, too, if unaccompanied by violence.
Mark Twain
I prefer milk because I am a Prohibitionist, but I do not go to it for inspiration.
Mark Twain
I am not the editor of a newspaper and shall always try to do right and be good so that God will not make me one.
Mark Twain
It is a good thing to write for the amusement of the public, but it is a far higher and nobler thing to write for their instruction, their profit, their actual and tangible benefit.
Mark Twain
Do not complain about growing old. It is a privilege denied to many.
Mark Twain
