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I thoroughly disapprove of duels. If a man should challenge me, I would take him kindly and forgivingly by the hand and lead him to a quiet place and kill him.

Mark Twain

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Mark Twain
Age: 74 †
Born: 1835
Born: November 30
Died: 1910
Died: April 21
Aphorist
Author
Autobiographer
Humorist
Journalist
Novelist
Opinion Journalist
Prosaist
Science Fiction Writer
Teacher
Florida
Missouri
Samuel Langhorne Clemens
Samuel L. Clemens
Samuel Clemens
Challenges
Suicide
Dueling
Hand
Killing
Disapproving
Death
Luck
Disapprove
Place
Challenge
Disapproval
Hands
Kill
Kindly
Take
Lead
Quarrels
Would
Quiet
Thoroughly
Men
Inspiration
Forgiveness
Duels

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You can't reason with your heart it has its own laws, and thumps about things which the intellect scorns.
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In my age, as in my youth, night brings me many a deep remorse. I realize that from the cradle up I have been like the rest of the race - never quite sane in the night.
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Our best built certainties are but sand-houses and subject to damage from any wind of doubt that blows
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What is the most rigorous law of our being? Growth. No smallest atom of our moral, mental, or physical structure can stand still a year. It grows - it must grow nothing can prevent it.
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Names are not always what they seem. The common Welsh name Bzjxxllwcp is pronounced Jackson.
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Who knows, he may grow up to be President someday, unless they hang him first! Aunt Polly about Tom Sawyer
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The nation is divided, half patriots and half traitors, and no man can tell which from which.
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Gratitude is a debt which usually goes on accumulating like blackmail the more you pay, the more is exacted.
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I am admonished in many ways that time is pushing me inexorably along. I am approaching the threshold of age in 1977 I shall be 142.
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when you recollect something which belonged in an earlier chapter, do not go back, but jam it in where you are . Discursiveness does not hurt an autobiography in the least.
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There is no such thing as a new idea. We simply take a lot of old ideas and put them into a sort of mental kaleidoscope.
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There are those who scoff at the schoolboy, calling him frivolous and shallow: Yet it was the schoolboy who said 'Faith is believing what you know ain't so'.
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Nothing so focuses the mind as the prospect of being hanged.
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I am not given to exaggeration, and when I say a thing I mean it.
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We must put up with clothes as they are they have their reason for existing. They are on us to expose us to advertise what we wear them to conceal.
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If one is honest there is no need to remember.
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I always take Scotch whiskey at night as a preventive of toothache. I have never had the toothache and what is more, I never intend to have it.
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There are several kinds of stories, but only one difficult kind-the humorous.
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Children have but little charity for one another's defects
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Human beings are the only creatures who blush - or who need to.
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