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You can't reason with your heart it has its own laws, and thumps about things which the intellect scorns.

Mark Twain

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Mark Twain
Age: 74 †
Born: 1835
Born: November 30
Died: 1910
Died: April 21
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Samuel Langhorne Clemens
Samuel L. Clemens
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More quotes by Mark Twain

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The southerner talks music.
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Persons attempting to find a motive in this narrative will be prosecuted persons attempting to find a moral in it will be banished persons attempting to find a plot in it will be shot. BY ORDER OF THE AUTHOR per G.G., CHIEF OF ORDNANCE
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More than once I had seen a noble who had gotten his enemy at a disadvantage stop to pray before cutting his throat.
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When your friends begin to flatter you on how young you look, it's a sure sign you're getting old.
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By law of periodical repetition, everything which has happened once must happen again and again -- and not capriciously, but at regular periods, and each thing in its own period, not another's and each obeying its own law.
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Shall we go on conferring our Civilization upon the peoples that sit in darkness, or shall we give those poor things a rest?
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I went to the circus, and loafed around the back side till the watchman went by, and then dived in under the tent. I had my twenty-dollar gold piece and some other money, but I reckoned I better save it.... I ain't opposed to spending money on circuses, when there ain't no other way, but there ain't no use in wasting it on them.
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I wasn't worth a cent two years ago, and now I owe two million dollars.
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I don't want my girl to be so skinny she can knife me with her knee.
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The community is eminently Portuguese - that is to say, it is slow, poor, shiftless, sleepy, and lazy.
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He was such a good man that people hated to see him coming.
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Every man is a moon and has a side which he turns toward nobody: you have to slip around behind it if you want to see it.
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When your opinions start to coincide with those of the majority, it is time to reconsider your opinions.
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The most interesting information comes from children, for they tell all they know and then stop.
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Love is an irreresisistible desire to be irresistibily desired.
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Heaven is by favor if it were by merit your dog would go in and you would stay out. Of all the creatures ever made (man) is the most detestable. Of the entire brood, he is the only one... that possesses malice. He is the only creature that inflicts pain for sport, knowing it to be pain.
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There is not a single human characteristic that can be safely labeled as American.
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If I can capture truth in its simplest form, beauty will follow like a sledgehammer.
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Etiquette requires us to admire the human race.
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To write without pay until somebody offers pay. If nobody offers pay within three years, the candidate may look upon this circumstance with the most implicit confidence as the sign that sawing wood is what he was intended for.
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