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Bridgeport? Said I. Camelot, Said he.

Mark Twain

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Mark Twain
Age: 74 †
Born: 1835
Born: November 30
Died: 1910
Died: April 21
Aphorist
Author
Autobiographer
Humorist
Journalist
Novelist
Opinion Journalist
Prosaist
Science Fiction Writer
Teacher
Florida
Missouri
Samuel Langhorne Clemens
Samuel L. Clemens
Samuel Clemens
Camelot

More quotes by Mark Twain

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There is nothing to be learned from the second kick of a mule.
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The only people who should use the possessive 'we' are kings, newspaper editors, and persons with tapeworms.
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To create man was a quaint and original idea, but to add the sheep was tautology.
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The reason most people don't go to church is because they've already been.
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Every time you stop a school, you will have to build a jail.
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Patriotism is merely a religion-love of country, worship of country, devotion to the country's flag and honor and welfare.
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Imagination labors best in distant fields.
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Familiarity breeds contempt. How accurate that is. The reason we hold truth in such respect is because we have so little opportunity to get familiar with it.
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It is a good idea to obey all the rules when you're young just so you'll have the strength to break them when you're old.
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I know all those people. I have friendly, social, and criminal relations with the whole lot of them.
Mark Twain
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Concentration of power in a political machine is bad and an Established Church is only a political machine it was invented for that it is nursed, cradled, preserved for that it is an enemy to human liberty, and does no good which it could not better do in a split-up and scattered condition.
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Go to bed early, get up early-this is wise.
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....try the mustard, - a man can't know what turnips are in perfection without mustard.
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Be respectful to your superiors, if you have any.
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When an audience does not complain, it is a compliment, and when it does, it is a compliment, too, if unaccompanied by violence.
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No amount of evidence will ever persuade an idiot
Mark Twain
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Every man has a secret ambition: To outsmart horses, fish and women.
Mark Twain
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You can't reason with your heart it has its own laws, and thumps about things which the intellect scorns.
Mark Twain
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There is no other life life itself is only a vision and a dream for nothing exists but space and you. If there was an all-powerful God, he would have made all good, and no bad.
Mark Twain
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'Classic.' A book which people praise and don't read.
Mark Twain