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Now and then we had a hope that if we lived and were good, God would permit us to be pirates.

Mark Twain

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Mark Twain
Age: 74 †
Born: 1835
Born: November 30
Died: 1910
Died: April 21
Aphorist
Author
Autobiographer
Humorist
Journalist
Novelist
Opinion Journalist
Prosaist
Science Fiction Writer
Teacher
Florida
Missouri
Samuel Langhorne Clemens
Samuel L. Clemens
Samuel Clemens
Good
Would
Pirates
Pirate
Sailing
Permit
Lived
Hope

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The Creator made Italy from designs by Michelangelo.
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There are times when one would like to hang the whole human race, and finish the farce.
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It is a shameful thing to insult a child.
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As a boy, I once saw a cart of melons that sorely tempted me. I sneaked up to the cart and stole a melon. I went into the alley to devour it, but no sooner had I set my teeth into it, than I paused, a strange feeling coming over me. I came to a quick conclusion. Firmly, I walked up to that cart, replaced the melon - and took a ripe one.
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Courage is resistance to fear, mastery of fear, not absence of fear.
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for business reasons, I must preserve the outward signs of sanity.
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Honest poverty is a gem that even a king might be proud to call his own - but I wish to sell out
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Do right and you will be conspicuous.
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The source of all humor is not laughter, but sorrow.
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Honor is a harder master than the law.
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If you have to swallow a frog, don't stare at it too long.
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When the end of the world comes, I want to be in Kentucky, because everything there happens 20 years after it happens anywhere else.
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Don't part with your illusions. When they are gone, you may still exist, but you have ceased to live.
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Cauliflower is nothing but cabbage with a college education.
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That is a society editor, sitting there elegantly dressed, with his legs crossed in that indolent way, observing the clothes the ladies wear, so that he can describe them for his paper and make them out finer than they are and get bribes for it and become wealthy.
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